The Choice Humorous Works, Ludicrous Adventures, Bons Mots, Puns, and Hoaxes of Theodore HookHook, Theodore Edward
General
The Choice Humorous Works, Ludicrous Adventures, Bons Mots, Puns, and Hoaxes of Theodore Hook
Hook, Theodore Edward
English wit and humor
There is not much stirring here; the good effect of the waters is
quite aperient in our family; we are all mending, and exorcise
ourselves for four hours at a time on what is called the well walk,
which is a different place from the sick walk, which is entirely for
the innphaleeds. Lavinia has got hold of a book called _Bookarchy_,
containing the lives of a hundred Knights, she says; but she won't
shew it to her sisters as is not yet marred; it is translated out of
a foren tongue by a Mr. D. Cameron; all the Scotch is very clever.
Mr. Fulmer is going to Hauksvut next term, to be made a Doctor of
Laws. He says he shall be away only two days, but I doubt its being
over so soon, because he told me himself it must be done by degrees.
After he is made a Doctor, he says he means to practise; but I told
him I thought he had better practise first, in order to understand
what he has to do afterwards. A friend of his came here to see him
from Hauksvut College, who I thought was a clergyman by his dress;
but I found out, by what Mr. Fulmer told me, that it was an old lady
in disguise, for he said she was Margaret Professor, and he even
went so far as to call her a Divinity, which to me did seem uncommon
strange. However, there is no understanding these scholars; for it is
not more than a fortnight since, that Fulmer told me he expected a
brazen-nosed man to dinner, and when the gentleman came, his nose was
just like other people's: so I suppose it was to surprise Lavinia,
who was reading a work on Nosology at the very time.
You will be pleased to hear that I have let my house in Montague
Place, unfurnished with conveniences, for three hundred and
twenty pounds a-year, besides taxis; and I have skewered a very
nice residence in the Regent's Park, within ten doors of the
Call-and-see-um where the portrait of St. Paul is to be exhibited,
and where I hope you will visit us; my two youngest, which is
a-shooten up, is uncommon anxious to know you, now they have made
their debutt into saucyity. The young one is a feline cretur as ever
trod shoe leather. The other is more of an orty crackter, with very
high spirts. They are indeed quite Theliar and Molpomona of the
Ramsbottoms.
If you should run down here before we leave for town, pray come and
take pot-luck, which is all we can offer you at Cheltenham. You must
take us as you find us: we are all in the family way, and, as you
know, delighted to see our friends, without any ceremony.
Do right, dear B., and send us the noose; for really the old Engines
who are here for their health look so billyus, that without something
to enliven us, we should get worse instead of better.
Ajew, ever yours,
D. L. RAMSBOTTOM.
XVIII.
HASTINGS AGAIN.
TO JOHN BULL.
Hastings, July 8, 1828.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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