The City Bride (1696): Or, The Merry CuckoldHarris, Joseph
General
The City Bride (1696): Or, The Merry Cuckold
Harris, Joseph
English drama
_Mer._ Go, go, find her out for shame Gentlemen; and do not stand idle
thus, Od's bobs, when I was a Young fellow and invited to a Wedding, I
used to frisk and Jump, and so bestir my self, that I made all the
_Green-sickness_ Girles in the Room blush like Rubies. Ah, hah! I was a
brisk Fellow in those Days, I'faith, and used to Cut Capers a Yard high:
Nor am I yet so Old, but I can take a round or two still--Come, come
Gentlemen, lets in again and firk it away, shall we not?
_Spr._ With all my Heart Mr. Justice.
_Mer._ Why that's well said Mr. _Spruce_, Ods bobs it was, and I thank
you heartily.
_Spr._ Come Madam, you must along with us, without you all's nothing.
_Arab._ I'll wait on you Gentlemen; if you will give me leave Sir.
[_To_ Bonvile.
_Bon._ Oh my best Joy! This Day you may Command.
_Mer._ That's right, that's right I'faith Gentlemen! This Day she
Commands, and he for ever after. Ods bobs I have done so my self, and
hope I shall do so still. Sister _Venter_, May I presume to ask if my
Brother can say as much?
[_Exit_ Bonvile, Arab. Spruce, _and the rest of the Guests._]
_Mrs. Vent._ Yes Brother, I think he may, I freely Give him leave.
_Mer._ Observe that Brother, she freely gives you leave: But who Gives
leave the Master or the Servant?
_Mr. Ven._ You are Merry Brother, and truly you have reason, having but
one Daughter and see her Married as you would have her.
_Mer._ Yes, I have one thank Heaven! You wou'd be glad Sister you cou'd
say so, but your Barrenness does give your Husband leave (if he please)
to look for Game elsewhere.
_Mrs. Ven._ Well, well Sir, tho you jeer me, and make a scorn of my
Sterility--
_Mer._ No, no, not I Sister, I scorn not your Sterility, nor your
Husbands Virility neither.
_Mrs. Ven._ My Husband's Virility! Pray spare my Husband; for he has not
been so idle as you imagin; He may have an--Offspring abroad for ought
you know, that you never heard of.
_Mr. Ven._ Oh fye Wife, You will not make it publick will you?
_Mrs. Ven._ And yet he keeps himself within compass for all that.
_Mr. Ven._ If you love me _Winny_--
_Mrs. Ven._ Na, I say no more, but thereby hangs a Tale.
_Mer._ Say'st thou so old Girle? What and has he been stragling then?
Nay; nay I know he is a Ventersome Man; And a--Merchant of small Wares
sometimes, especially when he can get a good Commodity: I love him the
better for't I'faith, Ods bobs I do--A notable spark with a Young Wench
in a corner, Is he not? A true Chip of the old block, his Father I
warrant him--But Sister, I have something to say to you in private,
concerning my Daughter.
_Enter Nurse._
_Nurse._ By your leave Good Folks, Is Master _Venter_ the Merchant here
I pray?
_Mr. Ven._ Oh Nurse! I am glad to see thee, How does my Boy?
_Nurse._ Very well, I thank Heaven Sir! He grows bravely I assure you.
'Tis a Chopping lad I promise you, and as like your good Worship; As if
he had been spit out of your Mouth.
_Mr. Ven._ Softly, Nurse softly.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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