The Collected Works of Ambrose Bierce, Volume 09: Tangential ViewsBierce, Ambrose
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The Collected Works of Ambrose Bierce, Volume 09: Tangential Views
Bierce, Ambrose
American essays; American literature
Just as Shakspeare poured out the unassorted jewels of his
inexhaustible understanding—cut, uncut, precious, bogus, crude,
contemptible and superb, all together, so Nature prodigally lavishes
her largess of color. I am not sure that Shakspeare did not teach her
the trick. Let the ladies, profiting by her bounty, emulate her virtues
and avoid her vice, each having due regard to her own kind of beauty,
and taking thought for its fitting embellishment and display. Let them
not permit the neutral-tinted minds of the “subdued-color” fiends to
fray them with utterance of feeble platitude.
An intolerable deal of nonsense has been uttered, too, about the
heartlessness of fashionable women in wearing the plumage of
song-birds—and all women are fashionable, and therefore “heartless,”
whom fortune has favored with means to that end. It is conceded by
those who utter the nonsense that it does no good; and that fact alone
would make it nonsense if the lack of wisdom did not inhere in its
every proposition. No doubt the offending female is herself somewhat
punctured in the conscience of her as she goes beautifuling herself
with the “starry plumes” which “expanded shine with azure, green and
gold,” and remembers the unchristian censure entailed by her passion
for this manner of headgear. If so, let her take comfort in this
present assurance that she is only obeying an imperious mandate of her
nature, which is also a universal law. To be comely in the eyes of the
male—that is the end and justification of her being, and she knows it.
Moreover, to the task of its accomplishment she brings an intelligence
distinctly superior to that with which we judge the result. We may
say that we don’t like her to have a fledged head; and that may be
true enough: our error consists in thinking that this is the same
proposition as that we don’t like her with her head fledged. Clearly,
we do: we like her better with her feathers than without, and shall
continue to prefer her that way as long as she is likely to hold the
feathers in service; then we shall again like her better without them,
even as we liked her better with them. The lesson whereof is that what
are called the “caprices” of fashion have an underlying law as constant
as that of gravitation.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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