You never seen such a furious woman as Missis Doppy was in your life, and Billy didn’t in hisn, but the Bible it says we shouldnt ever let our hungry passions arise, cause them which takes up the sword shall be for ever exalted. Labms is so famous that they have statutes in all the grave yards, just like soldiers in Washington, and now I will tell you a story which my sisters young man told me. One time General Grant, which was the greatest man in the world, was a bein showed the statutes which adorn the city of Washinton, and he said, General Grant did: “I never seen such a lot of gam doodled scare crows!” Then a good man which was a preacher he spoke up and said: “General, you oughtnt to swear, cause the wicked shall be casted in to Hell.” The General he said: “Thank you, I shouldnt mind that so very much, but I sure dont want to be casted in to bronze.” Statutes is made by sculptors, and thats why I say every creepin thing brings 4th after its own kind and multiplies excessive. DUCKS I said did Uncle Ned know what makes water run off a ducks back, and he said: “Yes, my boy, thats about the only thing that I am prepaired for to take a examnation on with out cribbin from the tex book. One time in the garden of Eden, Adam, which was takin home a bucket of coal oil, see the frog a sittin a sleep in the grass, and then he see the duck. The duck it snook up and pecked the frog real cruel on the spine of its back. If you catch a frog you will see the hump where its back was broke. “Adam he said: ‘You gum dasted beast of the field, why did you do that?’ “The duck tost its head contemptible and sed: ‘Cause he makes me tired, he is so disgustin clean, always takin a bath.’ “Adam said: ‘Dont you ever take a bath your own self?’ “The duck it said: ‘No, I dont, cause cleanity is only but jest a habit, and water is pizen.’ “That made Adam so mad that he flang the whole bucket of oil on the duck, which smelt awful and has been aquaticle ever since. It swims and dives and splashes all the life long day for to wash the oil off, but the water wont take hold.” I said why didnt the ducks wash their selfs with soap, but Uncle Ned he shook his head real mournful and said: “No, no, I have suggested that reform to them many a time and oft, but the march of mind is mighty slow in this world and, so far, they wont do any thing only but just eat the soap.” Ducks quack and the eagle he screams, and the high eany it laughfs when there isnt any thing funny, the cammel he snorts out of his nose and Franky, thats the baby, he gets soap in his eye and is like the battles roar! Frankys eyes is blue, but my sisters young mans is gray, and when she looks into hisn he looks into hern. And thats why I say how wondful are the works of Provdence! One day when him and her was to the picture gally she seen one which she liked real well and she said: “Isnt that a duck of a paintin?”