"But how did you get along with your paper during all that worry?" she
asked; and before he answered she added, "I don't see how you could
write anything."
"Worry is a bad producer, but a good critic," Henry replied. "And I
didn't try to write much," he added.
She put her elbows on the arm of her chair, rested her chin on her
hand and leaned toward him. "Do you know what I've been thinking of
ever since I came home?" she asked.
"Well," he answered, smiling on her, "as you haven't told me and as I
am not a mind-reader, I can't say that I do."
"Must I tell you?"
"Yes."
"And you won't be put out?"
"Surely not. You wouldn't want to tell me if you thought it would put
me out, would you?"
"No, but I was afraid this might." She hesitated. "I have been
thinking that you ought to go into business with father. Wait a
moment, now, please. You said you wouldn't be put out. You see how
much he needs you, and you ought to be willing to make a personal
sacrifice. You"--
He reached over and put his hand on her head. She looked into his
eyes. "Ellen, there is but one thing that binds me to a past that was
a hardship, but which after all was a liberty; and that one thing is
the fact that I am independent of the Colossus, the mill where
thousands of feet are treading. I have one glimpse of freedom, and
that is through the window of my office. It isn't possible that you
can wholly understand me, but let me tell you one time for all that I
shall have nothing to do with the store."
She put his hand off her head and settled back in her chair. "I
thought you might if I asked you, but I ought to have known that
nothing I could say would have any effect. You don't care for me; you
don't care for any of us."
"Ellen, it is but natural that you should side with father against me,
and it is also natural that I should decide in favor of myself. You
may say that on my part it is selfishness, and I may say that it is
more just than selfish. But you must _not_ say that I don't care for
you."
"Oh, it is easy enough for you to say that you _do_ care for me," she
replied. "It costs but a breath that must be breathed anyway; but if
you really cared for me you would do as I ask you--as I beg of you."
"Well," and he laughed at her, "there is a charming narrowness in that
view, I must say. If I love you I will grant whatever you may ask; and
if you love me--then what? Shall I answer?"
"Yes," she said, "as you seem to know what answer will be most
acceptable to you."
"No, not the answer most acceptable to me, but the one that seems to
be the most consistent. And if you love me," he continued, in answer
to the question, "you will not ask me to make a painful sacrifice."
He looked earnestly at her and added: "I think you'd better call me a
crank and dismiss the subject."
He expected her to take this as a humorous smoothing of their first
unpleasant ruffle, but if she did she shrewdly deceived him, for she
looked at him with the soberest of inquiry as she asked:
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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