In the evening Janina went to the theater for the performance. She
dressed as usual and sat thoughtlessly gazing at the rows of candles
pasted to the tables, at the scribbled walls and at the rows of
actresses sitting before their mirrors.
Sowinska continually hung about the dressing-room and observed her
curiously.
Her companions spoke to Janina, but she did not answer them. Every
now and then, she fell into a state of torpor in which one beholds
without seeing anything and lives without feeling, while deep
within, at the very bottom of her consciousness, there was reflected
the image of that dying woman and there swarmed and hissed those
stinging and scornful whispers of her neighbors, mixed with the
words of the Penitential Psalms.
Suddenly, a tremor ran through Janina, for a voice reached her from
the stage which sounded like Grzesikiewicz's; so she arose and went
out.
Wladek was standing on the stage, engaged in a lively conversation
with Majkowska, whose naked shoulders he was kissing.
Janina paused behind one of the scenes, for some feeling without a
name passed through her heart, like the sharp, cold edge of a
dagger, but was swiftly gone again, awakening in her a certain
knowledge.
"Mr. Niedzielski!" she called.
The actor threw back his shoulders, while across his clean-shaven
face there passed a shadow of impatience and boredom. He whispered
yet a few words into the ear of Mela, who smiled and departed, and
then, without trying to disguise his ill humor, he approached
Janina.
"Did you want anything?" he asked irascibly.
"Yes . . ."
In the despondency that filled her at that moment Janina wanted to
tell him that she was unhappy and ill. She longed to hear a warm
word of sympathy and felt an irresistible need of telling her
troubles to someone and of weeping on some friendly breast, but on
hearing the sharp tone of Wladek's voice, she suddenly remembered
how much she had suffered through him and how base he was, so she
suppressed those desires within herself.
"Are we going to play to-day?" she asked.
"We are. There are about a hundred rubles in the treasury."
"Ask them for some money for me."
"What do you think! Do you want me to make a fool of myself?
Moreover, I'm going right home."
Janina glanced at him and said in a quiet, expressionless voice:
"Take me home, for I feel so very miserable."
"I have no time, I must immediately run to my own home, for already
they are all waiting for me there."
"Oh, how base you are! How base you are!" she whispered.
Wladek recoiled a few steps, not knowing whether he should smile, or
pretend to be offended.
"Are you saying that to me, to me?" he asked. He did not dare to
swear, for that girl with her proud face and glance of a lady
imposed respect upon him and thrust back into his throat, as it
were, the brutalities that he wanted to hurl at her.
"To you!" Janina answered. "You are base! You are the basest person
in the world . . . do you hear! . . . the basest!"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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