The Comic History of EnglandÀ Beckett, Gilbert Abbott
History
The Comic History of England
À Beckett, Gilbert Abbott
Great Britain -- History -- Humor
"You're not joking?" cried Gaveston, as he looked through the rusty bars
of the fortress. "Honour bright," was the substance of the earl's
reply, and Piers put himself at once into the hands of Pembroke. It was
arranged that the king should meet the favourite at Wallingford; but one
morning, on the road, he was ordered out of bed at an unusually early
hour, when whom should he see, upon going downstairs, but the grim Earl
of Warwick! Gaveston began to feel that it was all up with him. Putting
him on a mule, they conveyed him to Warwick Castle, where a hurried
council was got up--the Duke of Lancaster in the chair--for his trial.
He was, of course, condemned, when he threw himself for pardon at the
feet of Lancaster, who kicked him aside, and all the rest gave him a
lesson on the Lancastrian system by a similar indignity. A proposition
was made in the body of the hall to spare his life, but somebody
exclaimed that "Gaveston had been the cause of all their difficulties,
and that, when a difficulty came in the way, the best plan was to
break the neck of it." The stem justice of this remark was instantly
acknowledged, and amid savage cries of "Bring him along!" they dragged
the favourite off to Blacklow Hill, where, by removing his head from his
shoulders, they made what may be called short work of him. Upon hearing
the news, the king cried for grief and then cried for vengeance. After
reconciling himself to his loss, he reconciled himself to the barons,
and the double reconciliation was greatly assisted by the barons
having given up to him (a.d. 1313) the plate and jewels of the deceased
favourite.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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