The Comic History of EnglandÀ Beckett, Gilbert Abbott
History
The Comic History of England
À Beckett, Gilbert Abbott
Great Britain -- History -- Humor
that he was living in Scotland, and one Serle, an old servant, went over
to recognise his majesty, but found in his place the court jester, who
bore some resemblance to the unfortunate sovereign. Serle, however,
determined on playing his cards to the best advantage, and thought it
a good speculation to play the fool off in place of the king, a trick
which was for a time successful. The buffoon humoured the joke, which
was a sorry one for its author, who was executed as a traitor, and
it might be as well if the same justice were dealt out to similar
delinquents in the present day, for indifferent jokes are the madness of
few for the gain of nobody.
Henry was now frightfully embarrassed by the quantity of bills pouring
in upon him for carrying on the war in Wales, and every day brought him
a fresh account which he had never expected. Even the musicians made
a claim, and the king, running his eye down a long list of items,
including a drum, a ditto, a ditto, a flute half a day, a pandean pipe,
_et caetera, et caetera_, exclaimed mournfully to his treasurer, "Alas!
I fear I cannot manage to pay the piper." In fact, the claims on account
of the war left him no peace, and he proposed taking a quantity of the
property of the church to settle with his creditors.
This proposition raised a perfect flame amongst the whole body of the
clergy. The Archbishop of Canterbury instantly took fire, while the
inferior members of the church were fearfully put out, and cold water
being thrown on the attempt, it was soon extinguished. Fighting was
still the business that Henry had on hand, for as fast as one of his
foes was down, another was ready to come on with fresh vigour. Old
Northumberland could not keep quiet, but Owen Glendower was perhaps the
most troublesome of all the king's enemies. The rapidity of the learned
gentleman's motions kept the other side constantly employed, for he
never hesitated to change the venue, or resort to a set-off, when he
wished to baffle his antagonists. At length, lack of funds, and its
customary concomitant, the loss of friends, compelled him not only
to stay proceedings, but to keep out of the way to avoid his heavy
responsibilities. He is supposed to have been engaged for years in a
protracted game at hide and seek, living at the homes of his daughters
and friends, but disguised always in a shepherd's plaid, to prevent
the servants from knowing him. What became of him was never known, and,
unfortunately for the historian, there were in those days no registrars
of either births, deaths, or marriages. Some say that Owen Glendower
ended his days at Mornington, but they might as well say Mornington
Crescent; and the place of his interment is no less doubtful, for where
he was buried is now buried in obscurity.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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