The Comic History of EnglandÀ Beckett, Gilbert Abbott
History
The Comic History of England
À Beckett, Gilbert Abbott
Great Britain -- History -- Humor
It was next determined by the court to delude the rebels by an offer
of a pardon; and Cade caught at the bait with a simplicity less
characteristic of a Jack than of a gudgeon. In two days, however, he
altered his mind, and refused to lay down his arms or walk off his legs,
until Government gave a guarantee for the fulfilment of its promises.
With the customary hatred of each other, which too often prevails among
the lovers of their country, the patriots commenced quarrelling. Cade
began to fear that some disinterested friend of freedom would sell him
for the thousand marks that were offered for his head; and Jack, from
the idea of being apprehended, was thrown into a constant state of
apprehension. Sneaking quietly downstairs in the night, he found his way
to the stable, where he mounted a clever hack, and using what spurs he
could to the animal's exertion, put him along at a slapping pace towards
the coast of Sussex. He had not proceeded very far, when turning to look
back on what he had gone through, he saw at his heels Alexander Iden,
Esq. Jack had scarcely got out the words, "Is that you, Alick?" when
a lick from Iden's sword revealed the purpose of his mission. "No, you
don't!" cried Cade, parrying an attempt to plant a second blow, and
putting in a slight poke with his battle-axe very efficiently. Were we
to borrow the graphic style of the sporting chroniclers, in describing
a fight, we should say that Iden came up smiling, and evidently meaning
business, which he transacted by enumerating one, two, three, in rapid
succession on Jack's chest, followed up by four, five, six, on the
face, and seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, in the stomach. Cade
endeavoured to rally, but every effort failed; and Alexander Iden, Esq.,
claimed the thousand marks that had been advertised. The amount was
large for a head with very little in it; but the tail, consisting of the
riff-raff led on by Cade, formed the real value of the article.
A dispute now commenced between persons of higher degree; or, rather, it
is to be suspected that Cade and his men had been used as the tools of
some more exalted malcontent. It very frequently happens that
political agitators in an humble rank of life are either cunningly or
unconsciously playing the game of a political schemer of more exalted
station; and while they are supposed to be working for the overthrow of
one tyrant, they are preparing the way for the establishment of another.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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