The Comic History of EnglandÀ Beckett, Gilbert Abbott
History
The Comic History of England
À Beckett, Gilbert Abbott
Great Britain -- History -- Humor
Perkin Warbeck made first for Cork in the hope of raising the Irish, but
as he could not raise the Spanish, the former would have nothing to
do with him. He next tried Cornwall, and marching inland he soon found
himself at the head of a party of discontented ragamuffins, who happened
to be ready for a row, without any ulterior views of a very definite
character. He called himself Richard the Fourth, and penetrated into
England as far as Taunton Dean, where Henry's forces had already
collected.
[Illustration: 365]
Warbeck was admirable in all his preliminary arrangements, and it was
"quite a picture" to see him reviewing his troops; but picture as he
was, the idea of fighting put him into such a fright, that he always
lost his colour. He was first-rate on parade, but quite unequal to the
business of a battle, and, indeed, to use an illustration founded on
a fact of our own times, he would have been invaluable in the Astley's
version of Waterloo, though utterly contemptible in the original
performance of that tremendous action.
No sooner had Perkin Warbeck ascertained the propinquity of the enemy
than he recommended that his forces should all go to bed in good time to
be fresh for action early in the morning. Having first ascertained that
all were asleep, he stole off to the stable, saddled his horse, and
having mounted the poor brute, stuck spurs into its side until
he reached the sanctuary of Beaulieu in the New Forest. When this
disgraceful desertion of their leader was discovered the rebels set up
a piteous howl and threw themselves on the mercy of Henry, who ordered
some to hang, and sent others to starve, by dismissing them without food
or clothing. Lady Catherine Gordon, alias Mrs. P. Warbeck, who had been
sojourning for safety at St. Michael's Mount in Cornwall, was brought
before the king, who, touched by her beauty and her tears, experienced
in his heart that truly English sentiment which declares, that "the man
who would basely injure a lovely woman in distress, is unworthy of the
name of a--a--British officer." He therefore sent her on a visit to the
queen, who paid every attention to the fallen heroine.
[Illustration: 366]
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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