The comic history of the United States, from a period prior to the discovery of America to times long subsequent to the presentSherwood, John D.
History
The comic history of the United States, from a period prior to the discovery of America to times long subsequent to the present
Sherwood, John D.
United States -- History -- Humor
Lively Frenchmen now multiplied along the yeasty Gulf. In 1718
Bienville, then the French governor of Louisiana, courageously braving
the alligators and swamp snakes, whose crescent attitude might have
terrified a son of St. Patrick, began the city of New Orleans, of which,
four years afterwards, Charlevoix, the historian and traveller, who
visited it, gives this description: “The place has a population of about
two hundred. I find it to consist of one hundred cabins disposed with
little regularity; a large wooden warehouse; two or three dwellings that
would be no ornament to a French village, and the half of a sorry
storehouse, which they were pleased to lend to the Lord, but of which he
had scarcely taken possession when it was proposed to turn him out to
lodge in a tent.” These kind of loans, some maliciously aver, have
continued fashionable in the Crescent City from that time to the
present. However that may be, certain it is that the French settlements
in America—a succinct narrative of which we had purposely deferred to
give in connection with their last desperate struggle for power—had at
the close of King George’s war, in 1748, reached their greatest
extension. Imperial, too, was their stretch. Beginning at St. John’s,
New Brunswick, and dotting the wide area that fills seventeen hundred
miles between that point and the Mississippi River, at the present
spunky little city of St. Paul, and stretching down that river fourteen
hundred miles to its outlet, and so spreading westward into Texas, and
eastward through Mississippi and Alabama, until they confronted the old
Spanish plantation in Florida, these settlements zoned on three sides
with a spiked belt the thirteen English Colonies on the Atlantic.
Around the middle of the eighteenth century, the accumulations of hatred
through the preceding four had gathered to a festering head the hostile
memories of the French race of English assumption, victories, and
national contempt; and so through all this wide circuit of settlement,
under cassock and surplice, under the coat of the soldier and the
bear-skin of the trader, beat zealous French hearts, ready to assert the
claims of a king deemed by them rightfully in possession, and to earn
the absolution of a spiritual sovereign at Rome, ready, since the schism
of Henry VIII., to be given to any one who would despoil or destroy the
heretic English.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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