"Friend Candidus, thou often doost demaund What humours men by gulling understand: Our English Martiall hath full pleasantly, In his close nips describde a gull to thee: I'le follow him, and set downe my conceit What a gull is: oh word of much receit! He is a gull, whose indiscretion Cracks his purse strings to be in fashion; He is a gull, who is long in taking roote In baraine soyle, where can be but small fruite: He is a gull, who runnes himselfe in debt, For twelue dayes wonder, hoping so to get; He is a gull, whose conscience is a block, Not to take interest, but wastes his stock: He is a gull, who cannot haue a whore, But brags how much he spends upon her score: He is a gull, that for commoditie Payes tenne times ten, and sells the same for three: He is a gull, who passing finicall, Peiseth each word to be rhetoricall: And to conclude, who selfe conceitedly, Thinkes al men guls: ther's none more gull then he." G.] IN RUFFUM. 3. Rufus the Courtier at the theater, Leaving the best and most conspicuous place, Doth either to the stage[10] himselfe transferre, Or through a grate[11] doth shew his double[12] face: For that the clamorous fry of Innes of Court, Fills up the priuate roomes of greater price: And such a place where all may haue resort, He in his singularity doth dispise. Yet doth not his particular humour shun The common stews and brothells of the towne, Though all the world in troops doe hither[13] run, Cleane and uncleane, the gentle and the clowne: Then why should Rufus in his pride abhorre, A common seate, that loues a common whore. [Footnote 10: See Note on Epigram 28. G.] [Footnote 11: Malone has cited this passage (Shakespeare by Boswell iii. 81) and, if he explains it rightly, the allusion is to one of the two boxes (sometimes called _private boxes_) which were situated on each side of the balcony or upper stage. D.] [Footnote 12: Other editions (as the Isham) 'doubtfull.' G.] [Footnote 13: Other editions (as the Isham) 'thither.' G.] IN QUINTUM. 4. Quintus the dancer useth euermore, His feet in measure and in rule to moue: Yet on a time he call'd his Mistresse, 'whore' And thought[14] with that sweet word to win her loue: Oh had his tongue like to his feet beene taught It neuer would haue uttered such a thought. IN PLURIMOS.[15] 5.