"Yay," sed the Shaker, and he led the way into the house, another Shaker bein sent to put my hosses and waggin under kiver. A solum female, lookin sumwhat like a last year's beanpole stuck into a long meal bag, cum in axed me was I athurst and did I hunger? to which I urbanely anserd "a few." She went orf and I endeverd to open a conversashun with the old man. "Elder, I spect?" sed I. "Yay," he said. "Helth's good, I reckon?" "Yay." "What's the wages of a Elder, when he understans his bizness--or do you devote your sarvices gratooitus?" "Yay." "Stormy night, sir." "Yay." "If the storm continners there'll be a mess underfoot, hay?" "Yay." "It's onpleasant when there's a mess underfoot?" "Yay." "If I may be so bold, kind sir, what's the price of that pecooler kind of weskit you wear, incloodin trimmins?" "Yay!" I pawsd a minit, and then, thinkin I'd be faseshus with him and see how that would go, I slapt him on the shoulder, bust into a harty larf, and told him that as a yayer he had no livin ekal. He jumpt up as if Bilin water had bin squirted into his ears, groaned, rolled his eyes up tords the sealin and sed: "You're a man of sin!" He then walkt out of the room. Jest then the female in the meal bag stuck her hed into the room and statid that refreshments awaited the weary travler, and I sed if it was vittles she ment the weary travler was agreeable, and I follored her into the next room. I sot down to the table and the female in the meal bag pored out sum tea. She sed nothin, and for five minutes the only live thing in that room was a old wooden clock, which tickt in a subdood and bashful manner in the corner. This dethly stillness made me oneasy, and I determined to talk to the female or bust. So sez I, "marrige is agin your rules, I bleeve, marm?" "Yay." "The sexes liv strickly apart, I spect?" "Yay." "It's kinder singler," sez I, puttin on my most sweetest look and speakin in a winnin voice, "that so fair a made as thow never got hitched to some likely feller." [N.B.--She was upards of 40 and homely as a stump fence, but I thawt I'd tickil her.] "I don't like men!" she sed, very short. "Wall, I dunno," sez I, "they're a rayther important part of the populashun. I don't scacely see how we could git along without 'em." "Us poor wimin folks would git along a grate deal better if there was no men!" "You'll excoos me, marm, but I don't think that air would work. It wouldn't be regler." "I'm fraid of men!" she sed. "That's onnecessary, marm. YOU ain't in no danger. Don't fret yourself on that pint." "Here we're shot out from the sinful world. Here all is peas. Here we air brothers and sisters. We don't marry and consekently we hav no domestic difficulties. Husbans don't abooze their wives--wives don't worrit their husbans. There's no children here to worrit us. Nothin to worrit us here. No wicked matrimony here. Would thow like to be a Shaker?" "No," sez I, "it ain't my stile."