Thare iz a grate deal ov magnificent poverty in our big citys, people who eat klam soup out ov a tin basin with a gold spoon. The place whare poverty, virtew, and love meet and worship together, iz the most sakred spot in this universe. Experience don’t make a man so bold az it duz so careful. Pride never forgets itself, never haz a play spell or frolik; it iz stiff from morning till night, from top tew bottom, like a sled stake. Thare ain’t but very little ginowine good sense in this world enny how, and what little thare iz ain’t in market, it iz held for a dividend. Thoze who hav made up their minds tew lead a life ov enjoyment will find the following recipee a grate help tew them: “_To one ounce ov plezzure add a pound ov repentance._” Adversity iz a poultess which reduces our vanity and strengthens our virtew--even a boy never feels half so good az when he haz just bin spanked and sot away tew cool. Pedantry iz the science ov investing what little yu know in one kind ov perfumery, and insisting upon sticking that under every man’s knose whom yu meet. Lieing iz like trieing tew hide in a fog, if yu move about yure are in danger ov bumping yure hed agin the truth, and az soon az the fog blows oph yu are gone enny how. Marrying an angel iz the poetry ov marriage, but living with her iz the proze; and this iz all well enuff if the taste ov the poetry hain’t spilte our relish for the proze. The man who livs on hope must pick the bones ov dissapointment. The Devil iz sed tew be the father ov lies, if this iz so, he haz got a large family, and a grate menny promising children amung them. Life iz like a mug ov beer, froth at the top, ail in the middle, and settlings at the bottom. We should liv in this life az tho we war walking on glaze ice, liable tew fall at enny moment, and tew be laffed at bi the bystanders. Men, if they ain’t too lazy, liv sumtimes till they are 80, and destroy the time a good deal az follows: the fust 30 years they spend throwing stones at a mark, the seckond 30 they spend in examining the mark tew see whare the stuns hit, and the remainder iz divided, in cussing the stun-throwing bizzness, and nussing the rumatizz. This setting down and folding our arms, and waiting for sumthing tew turn up, iz just about az rich a spekulashun az going out into a four hundred acre lot, setting down on a sharp stone, with a pail between our knees, and waiting for a cow tew back up and be milked. HOOKS & EYES. Thare are people who dont do ennything but watch their simptoms. I hav seen dogs ackt just az sensible, i hav seen a rat tarrier watch the simptoms ov a knot hole, in a board fence, all day, for sum rat tew cum out, but no rat didn’t cum out. The man who cant do any hurt in this world cant do any good. The grate art ov keeping friends iz tew keep them in expectancy. After we hav got all a mans sekrets out ov him then we either dispise him or pitty him, and to be pittyed iz no better than to be dispised.