Tew be happy--take things az they cum, and let them go jist az they cum. It takes a grate deal of money tew make a man ritch, but it don’t take but little virtew. It iz the little things ov this life that plague us-- Muskeeters are plenty, elephants skarse. What an agreeable world this would be tew liv in if we could pump all the pride and selfishness out ov it! It would improve it az much az taking the fire and brimstun out ov the other world. Don’t mistake plezzure for happiness; it iz entirely a different breed ov dogs. Thare is a grate deal ov exquisitt plezzure in happiness, but thare iz a grate deal ov plezzure that haz no happiness in it. Thare iz only one thing that i kan think ov now, that i like to see idleness in, and that iz, in mollassiss--i want mi mollassiss slo and eazy. Experience haz the same effekt on most folks that age haz on a goose, it makes them tuffer. “_Sewing Sosietys_,” are generally places whare the wimmin meet to rip and so--up the naberhood. A lazy man iz one who haz no time to spare; an industrious man iz one who haz more time to spare than he knows what to do with. It takes a smart man to conceal from others what he don’t kno. A lazy man alwus works harder than a bizzy one--the hardest work i kno ov, iz to grunt--it iz harder tew set still, and fite flies, than it iz tew git up and escape from them. KINDLING WOOD. Young man, when yu hav tew sarch Webster’s Dickshionary tew find words big enuff tew convey yure meaning yu kan make up yure mind that yu don’t mean mutch. We admire modesty in a woman for the same reason that we admire bravery in a man. Genuine grief iz like penitence, not klamorous but subdued; sorrow from the hous tops and penitence in a market place shows more ambishun than piety. About the best thing that experiense kan do for us iz tew learn us how tew enjoy mizery. It iz a grate art tew kno how tew “gather figs from thistles,” but philosophy teaches it. The reazon whi so phew people are happy in this world iz bekauze they mistake their boddys for their souls. We are poor not from what we need, but from what we want; necissitys are not only natral, but cheap. [Illustration] I had rather hav a drop ov pepmint ile than a quart ov pepmint essence--i had rather drink out ov a spring than tew drink a hundred yards belo, for this reazon, when I read a book it iz one written by an old author whoze thoughts the modern writer haz attempted tew improve bi diluting. This world iz phull ov heros and heroines, and the reason whi so menny ov them live unnoticed iz bekause they adorn every day life and not an ockashun. All suckcessful flirts hav sharp eyes, one eye they keep on yu and one on the other phellow. Vanity iz called a discreditabel pashun, but the good things that men do kan oftner be traced tew their vanity than tew their virtew. Man iz a hily eddikated animal.