Religion in theze days, iz compozed ov vanity, and piety, and each man and woman iz a better judge ov the proportion than I am. Lovers feed upon mysteries, but after they are married, and the pork and beans are brought on, they hav a fair chance tew test the real qualitys ov their appetights. An insult tew one man iz an insult tew all, for it may be our turn next. I don’t kno ov enny thing that would use the whole ov us up more thoroughly, than tew hev all ov our wishes gratified. Thare iz 2 kinds ov obstinacy, obstinacy in the right, and obstinacy in the wrong, one iz the strength ov a grate mind, and the other iz the strength ov a little one. Lazyness iz like mollassis, sweet and sticky. I think a bear in hiz claws, iz prefarable tew one with gloves on. I kant tell now which I admire least, an old coquett, or a young prude. Misanthropy don’t pay--thare aint no man living whoze hate the world cares one cuss for. Rash men ken be korrekted, but it dont pay to labour with a phool. The man who haz never enjoyed the plezzure ov being forgiven, haz missed one ov the greatest luxurys ov life. I hav seen coquettry, that had no more malice in it, than a ewe lamb, frisking on the green. When i cum acrost a man who utters hiz opinyuns with immense deliberashun, and after they are uttered they dont amount to ennything, I write him down “misterious phool.” The grate cry ov the world now daze iz, “Whats trumps.” Love iz a weakness,--but it iz the same kind ov a weakness that repentance iz, both ov them are creditable tew our natures. A man iz hiz own best friend, and worst enemy. Jealousy iz one ov loves parasites. We kan endure vices in the young that we should despise in the old--(pleaze make a note ov this old phellows). Friendship iz like earthenware, if it iz broken it kan be mended, but love iz like a mirror, once broken, that ends it. I dont kno ov enny thing on the face ov this earth more remorseless, than 7 per cent interest. Thare iz a grate deal ov difference between enduring misfortunes because we expekt to, and enduring them bekauze we are obliged to, one iz pashunce, and the other iz mere sullenness. When i see an old man marry a young wife, i consider him starting out on a bust, for I am reminded ov the parable in the Bible, about new wine, and old bottles. SAWS. Thar iz no limit tew the vanity of this world, each spoke in the wheel thinks the whole strength ov the wheel depends upon it. [Illustration: SAWS.] The only claim enny man kan have upon the world, after he haz left it, iz for good examples. Thare iz just az mutch difference between precept and example, az thare iz between a horn that blows a noize, and one that blows a tune. Thare seems tew be a propriety in all things; late experiments in New York city, have proved, that religion in a rat pit iz a failure. Grate examples are no excuse for iniquity. Our Saviour thought so when he sed: “Git thee behind me, Satan.”