It kan stand on her hed, or on her feet, or lay down on her side, and be the same thing all the time. It kan turn a summerset over backwards, or back a summersett over forwards. Menny ov our most noble pollyticians hav bent theirselfs in diffrent spots so often that they travel like a sick snake. Thare iz one little _Bend_, prakticed bi both old and young men, that haz opened the way for more anguish than awl the other crooks in the world put in a heap together, i mean the elbo _Bend_, that cauzes the mout tew fly apart on its hinges, and let the burglar whiskee tew rob the brain ov its patrimony reazon, and illuminate the soul with the torchlights ov the devil. In life matrimonial we hav the conjugaler _Bend_, which brings a man down on the hard pan ov hiz knees, and makes him az eazy, and interesting tew handle as a rat in a steel trap. This iz a good _Bend_ tew take once in a while, but never ought tew git chronick. This puts me in mind tew soliliquize az follows:--a household, with a woman at the top ov it, and a man at the bottom ov it, iz one ov thoze concerns whare the wife haz authority without power, whare the yung ones are sassy without reproach, and whare the husband iz meek without virtew. In fashionabel life a new _Bend_ haz just appeared, (August 19th, 1868,) which iz under the patronage ov both genders, the fop and the belle. This iz a dorsal _Bend_ near the back fin, and gives the wearers ov it, when in moshun, the appearance ov a hen turkey making for a woodshed in a heavy shower ov rain. I kno ov no meaning or apology for this crook, only the name ov it, it iz called the Grecian _Bend_, which iz expekted tew sanktify it. I don’t kno how the present inhabitants ov Greece do their travelling; they are about played out, and may be hump backed. But if Solan, the ancient wisdom maker and law-giver ov Athens, had caught one ov hiz gals with this gorge in her back, i will bet 10 dollars he would hav ordered it taken oph with a jack-plane. How long this knapsack gait will continnew to be fashionabel in New York, the home ov folly, whare just now it iz being experimented with, i am unabel tew reply, but i hope not long enuff tew transmit the hump tew posterity. I love mi fair yung countrywimmin with a gladness bordering on delirium tremens, and when a native ov Madagascar, not more than haff civilized, asked me the other day, on Broadway, what ailed all the yung squaws he met, i waz forced tew hide a tear, and reply hurriedly, in lo Duch: “Nix for stix!” and shook oph the Madagaskine cuss quick. I don’t know ov but one thing now that but few would hanker for, if it should ever bekum fashionabel again, and that iz good, square, pony-bilt common sense, without enny _Bend_ in it. Common sense in these times haz tew beg for a living.