It iz very simple tew make a hornets nest if yu kan, but i will argue enny man 300 dollars he kant bild one that he could sell tew a hornet for half price. Hornets are az bizzy az their second couzzins, the bee, but what they are about the lord only knows, they dont lay up enny honey, nor enny money, they seem tew be bizzy only jist for the sake ov working all the time, they are alwus in az mutch ov a hurry az tho they waz going for a doktor. I suppose this uneazy world would grind arownd on its axletree onst in 24 hours, even if thare want enny hornets, but hornets must be good for sumthing, but i kant think now what it iz. Thare haint been a bug made yet in vain, nor one that want a good job, thare iz ever lots ov human men loafing around black smith shops, and cider mills, all over the country, that dont seem tew be necessary for ennything but tew beg plug tobacco and swear, and steal water-melons, but yu let the cholera brake out once, and then yu will see the wisdum ov having jist sich men laying around loose, they help count. Next tew the cockroach, who stands tew the hed, the hornet haz got the most waste stummuk, in reference tew the rest ov hiz boddy, than enny ov the insek populashun, and here iz another mistery: what on arth duz a hornet want so mutch reserve corps for. I hav jist thought--tew carry hiz javelin in, thus you see, the more we diskover about things the more we are apt to know. It iz alwus a good purchase tew pay out our last surviving dollar for wisdum, and wisdum iz like the misterious hens egg, it aint laid in yure hand, but iz laid away under the barn, and yu hav got tew sarch for it. The hornet iz an unsoshall kuss, he iz more haughty than he iz proud, he iz a thorough bred bug, but hiz breeding and refinement haz made him like sum other folks i kno ov, dissatisfied with himself, and everyboddy else, too mutch good breding ackts this way sumtimes. Hornets are long-lived--i kant state jist how long their lives are, but i kno, from instinkt and observashun, that enny kritter, be he bug or be he devil, who is mad all the time, and stings every good chance he kan git, gennerally outlives all his nabers. The only way tew git at the exact fiteing weight ov the hornet, is tew tutch him, let him hit you once with his javelin, and you will be willing tew testify in court that sumboddy run a one-tined pitchfork into yer; and az for grit, i will state for the informashun ov thoze who haven’t had a chance tew lay in their vermin wisdum az freely az i hav, that one single hornet, who feels well, will brake up a large camp meeting! What the hornets do for amuzement iz another question i kant answer, but sum ov the best read, and heavyest thinkers amung the naturalists say they hav target excursions, and heave their javelins at a mark; but i don’t imbibe this assershun raw, for i never knu enny boddy, so bitter at heart az the hornets are, to waste a blow.