The Confession of a Child of the CenturyMusset, Alfred de
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The Confession of a Child of the Century
Musset, Alfred de
French fiction; Historical fiction
We were alone, the window was open, the murmur of a little fountain came
to us from the garden. O God! would that I could count, drop by drop, all
the water that fell while we were sitting there, while she was talking
and I was responding. It was there that I became intoxicated with her to
the point of madness.
It is said that there is nothing so rapid as a feeling of antipathy, but
I believe that the road to love is more swiftly traversed. Of what avail
are words spoken with the lips when hearts listen and respond? What
sweetness in the glance of a woman who begins to attract you! At first it
seems as though everything that passes between you is timid and
tentative, but soon there is born a strange joy, and echo answers the
voice of love; the thrill of a dual life is felt. What a touch! What a
strange attraction! And when love is sure of itself and recognizes
fraternity in the object beloved, what serenity in the soul! Words die on
the lips, for each one knows what the other is about to say before
utterance has shaped the thought. Souls expand, lips are silent. Oh! what
silence! What forgetfulness of all!
Although my love began the first day and had since grown to excess, the
respect I felt for Madame Pierson sealed my lips. If she had been less
frank in permitting me to become her friend, perhaps I would have been
more bold, for she had made such a strong impression on me, that I never
quitted her without transports of love. But there was something in her
frankness and the confidence she placed in me, that checked me; moreover,
it was in my father's name that I had been treated as a friend. That
consideration rendered me still more respectful and I resolved to prove
worthy of that name.
To talk of love, they say, is to make love. We rarely spoke of it. Every
time I happened to touch the subject Madame Pierson led the conversation
to some other topic. I did not discern her motive, but it was not
prudery; it seemed to me that at such times her face took on a stern
aspect and a wave of feeling, even of suffering, passed over it. As I had
never questioned her about her past life and was unwilling to do so, I
respected her obvious wishes.
Sunday there was dancing in the village; she was almost always there. On
those occasions her toilet, although always simple, was more elegant than
usual; there was a flower in her hair, a bright ribbon, or some such
bagatelle; but there was something youthful and fresh about her. The
dance, which she loved for itself as an amusing exercise, seemed to
inspire her with a frolicsome gaiety. Once launched on the floor, it
seemed to me she allowed herself more liberty than usual, that there was
an unusual familiarity. I did not dance, being still in mourning, but I
managed to keep near her, and, seeing her in such good humor, I was often
tempted to confess my love.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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