Lo, there was great rejoicing in all Secessia,--there was naught heard save the voices of renegade Northern editors,--[for that the Southerners know not to write],-- Saying, 'Come, let us be glad; laugh, O thou my soul. 'For they have gone, they have escaped, they have got away, they have dodged, they have cut stick, they have vamosed the ranch. 'They have ripped it full chisel, they are off licketty-split, they have slid, they have made tracks, they have mizzled--they have absquatulated and clipped it; _abiit, evasit, crupit_! Hurrah for us! 'Lo, the Yankees are brought low--the nasty, mercenary, low-born, infernal mudsills are defiled, and become as a vain thing. _Gloria_! 'For our messengers are on the high seas; they are O.K.; they shall deliver us from the pit. _Victoria_! 'They will drive things chuck to the hub in slasher-gaff style; our foes shall become even as dead birds in the pit; they shall be euchred, and discounted, and we will rake down the pot. 'Come, let us take drinks, for who shall stand against us?' CHAPTER IV. Now it came to pass that when UNCLE SAMUEL heard of these things, he was sorely riled; yea, his wrath was like unto a six-story stack of wolverines and wild-cats, mixed with sudden death and patent chain-lightning. Howbeit he lost no time, and tarried not to take a long swear over the business, But sent forth his ships: Sending likewise THURLOW, whose surname was WEED, to prevail over MASON and SLY-DEAL, and come vitriol over their vinegar. But when the people heard THURLOW say, 'I go, indeed, unto Europe, but not on this business--SLIDELL may slide for aught I care,' Then the multitude winked one unto the other, so that such terrible winking was never before seen, Exclaiming, 'Oh, yes--in a horn. We knew it not before, but now we know it for certain.' And a certain SIMEON, whose surname was DRAPER, stood up in the market-place and wagered that THURLOW would pull the wool over Mason, and humble him; And there were no takers. _Selah_. CHAPTER V. Now there was a valiant captain, a man of war, hating all iniquity even as poison. And his name was WILKES--honor and praise to it in all lands!-- Captain of the San Jacinto, cruising for a pirate on the high seas, even for the Sumter. And he came from Africa, even from the East unto the Havana, in an isle of the sea which lieth under the tower of the Moro; Where he heard from his Consul strange news, saying that MASON and SLIDELL had sailed in a British steamer, even the Trent, which saileth between Vera Cruz, Havana, and St. Thomas. Then said the captain, 'Shall I refrain myself to stop this iniquity? 'Arise, oh my soul, gird thyself, and go forth; tarry not, but nab them in their wickedness. 'Take them where the hair is short; jerk them, and pull them even as the fancy policeman pulleth the pickpocket when he seeth him picking the pocket of the righteous. 'Shall I hold back my hand when my country calleth? Not if I know it. _Selah_.