The Continental Monthly, Vol. 1, No. 2, February, 1862: Devoted To Literature And National Policy — John Shaqi
The Continental Monthly, Vol. 1, No. 2, February, 1862: Devoted To Literature And National PolicyVarious
History
The Continental Monthly, Vol. 1, No. 2, February, 1862: Devoted To Literature And National Policy
Various
Literature, Modern -- 19th century -- Periodicals; United States -- Politics and government -- 19th century -- Periodicals
'You must make your own application, sir,' he rejoined. 'I say your
statement is false--so false that a mere mistake can scarcely be
considered responsible for it.'
'Such a reiteration of your insult,' I said, 'leaves me no redress
except by force. As you gave the first offense, I return it to your
keeping.' So saying, I struck him.
By-standers, who had been attracted around, now seized us, and there
was, of course, much excitement and confusion.
'This is a simple matter of private business, gentlemen,' said Mr.
Sefton, 'and its settlement will take place elsewhere.'
'Yes, gentlemen,' I added, 'your interference now is not required, and
hereafter will be of no avail.' So we separated.
I proceeded to my place of business and retired to my secret chamber,
giving orders to admit no one to me (lest I should be disturbed by the
officiousness of friends seeking to 'arrange' matters), but to send up
any letters. Soon a formal challenge arrived, to which I despatched a
formal answer. At the hour of closing business I sought my chief clerk,
whom I knew to be a sporting man, and briefly informed him of the
anticipated duel, which was appointed for an early hour the next
morning, the weapons pistols, and the place a short distance from the
city, and engaged him to act as my second.
I occupied the evening in the necessary preparations of my affairs for
the contingency of a fatal issue. Near midnight I went to my residence,
and in the seclusion of my sleeping chamber passed an hour in a
tumultuous variety of thought. I had briefly written, for Evelyn's
perusal, a history of my life as connected with her, and a true version
of the circumstances leading to the duel. 'If I fall'--I sadly
thought--'will she appreciate my self-offering? Shall I leave her a
legacy of sorrow, if my death under these circumstances would grieve
her? No! I will die as I have thus far lived--making no expression of
the love which sways my soul.' I tore my letter into fragments and
burned them. Passing silently into her chamber,--the first time I had
entered it for long months,--I kneeled at her bedside and sobbed. By the
dim light I could trace the marks of grief--cold, heart-consuming
grief--on her beautiful features--marks which in the day-time resolute
pride effaced; as the furrows in the rocks of the sea-shore are seen at
ebb-tide, but are concealed when the waters bound at their flood. Slowly
and cautiously I approached my lips to hers, and lightly touched them.
She stirred, and I sank to the floor. Her sleep being but lightly
disturbed, I glided like a ghost from the chamber, and with a
heart-rending groan threw myself on my bed and forced forgetfulness and
slumber.
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