The Continental Monthly, Vol 2, No 6, December 1862: Devoted to Literature and National PolicyVarious
History
The Continental Monthly, Vol 2, No 6, December 1862: Devoted to Literature and National Policy
Various
Literature, Modern -- 19th century -- Periodicals; United States -- Politics and government -- 19th century -- Periodicals
There are a great many men, dear CONTINENTAL, who quite unwittingly are
ever crying aloud, 'Look at me, chickens.' After all, 'tis only the old
fable of the lion cubasinized.
Thine ever,
CHICKENS.
* * * * *
Our Chicago friend, J.M., will accept our thanks for his favor. Chicago
is a warm friend to our Magazine.
EDITOR OF CONTINENTAL:
_Dear Sir_,--Occasionally a 'good thing' comes up to illustrate this
wicked rebellion, which all patriots are striving to put down, in our
once happy land. When the news of the taking of New Orleans reached our
city, a friend meeting on the street another, who, like our worthy
President, is fond of a good story, spake as follows:
'Wonder what Jeff. Davis will think now?'
'It reminds me of a little story,' was the answer.
'Fire away then.'
'When Ethan Allen was a prisoner of war in London, a party of wags, who
had made his acquaintance, and who were pleased with his drolleries, and
who were in the habit of giving him dinners for the pleasure of his
company, discovered in him a marvellous great fondness for pickles. On
this platform they procured some East India peppers--which are about as
hot as live hickory coals--and placed them in front of his seat at
table, in as tempting a position as possible: which done, they sat down
to dinner. While the first course was being served, Allen could not
restrain his love for the article; and very quietly transferred one of
them from the plate to his mouth, giving it a quick pressure of the jaws
for the purpose of hastily disposing of it; when, lo and behold! instead
of the luscious vegetable he so much enjoyed, he found he had taken into
his capacious mouth something about as hot and burning as fire itself.
To relieve his agony, he applied his hand to his mouth, at the same time
using his napkin to remove the tears and perspiration, and also conceal
the contractions of his face, when, hastily casting a glance around the
table, he at once discovered the point of the joke in the countenances
of those around him. Summoning all his coolness for the instant, he very
deliberately deposited the 'pesky' thing in his hand, and then returned
it to the plate with all the gravity he could command, remarking at the
same time, 'With your permission, gentlemen, I will put _that_ d--d
thing back!'
Whether Jeff. Davis and his satellites would not like to perform the
same operation with their pet dogma, Secession, I leave for your readers
to decide; remarking that, in my own opinion, they would sleep better if
they were back again, as in 1860. Prisons and halters are not pleasant
to reflect on and anticipate, particularly when they are remarkably well
deserved, as they are.
Old ETHAN ALLEN! Would he were alive again! Oh, for one hour of that
DUNDEE! Well, the time will answer its own needs, and this war will not
pass by without its man of iron. He cometh! Who is he to be? GEORGE
MCCLELLAN, you have it in you!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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