“’Gad,” said he next day to me, “cut again last night. Have an idea that I abused Lovel. When I have a little wine on board, always speak my mind, don’t you know. Last time I was here in my poor sister’s time, said somethin’ to her, don’t quite know what it was, somethin’ confoundedly true and unpleasant I daresay. I think it was about a fellow she used to go on with before she married the sugar-baker. And I got orders to quit, by Jove, sir—neck and crop, sir, and no mistake! And we gave it one another over the stairs. O my! we did pitch in!—And that was the last time I ever saw Cecilia—give you my word. A doosid unforgiving woman, my poor sister was, and between you and me, Batchelor, as great a flirt as ever threw a fellar over. You should have heard her and my Lady B. go on, that’s all!—Well, mamma, are you going out for a drive in the coachy-poachy?—Not as I knows on, thank you, as I before had the honour to observe. Mr. Batchelor and me are going to play a little game at billiards.” We did, and I won; and, from that day to this, have never been paid my little winnings. On the day after the doughty captain’s arrival, Miss Prior, in whose face I had remarked a great expression of gloom and care, neither made her appearance at breakfast nor at the children’s dinner. “Miss Prior was a little unwell,” Lady Baker said, with an air of most perfect satisfaction. “Mr. Drencher will come to see her this afternoon, and prescribe for her, I daresay,” adds her ladyship, nodding and winking a roguish eye at me. I was at a loss to understand what was the point of humour which amused Lady B., until she herself explained it. “My good sir,” she said, “I think Miss Prior is not at all _averse_ to being ill.” And the nods recommenced. “As how?” I ask. “To being ill, or at least to calling in the medical man.” “Attachment between governess and Sawbones I make bold for to presume?” says the captain. “Precisely, Clarence—a very fitting match. I saw the affair, even before Miss Prior owned it—that is to say, she has not denied it. She says she can’t afford to marry, that she has children enough at home in her brothers and sisters. She is a well-principled young woman, and does credit, Mr. Batchelor, to your recommendation, and the education she has received from her uncle, the Master of St. Boniface.” “Cissy to school; Pop to Eton; and Miss Whatdyoucall to grind the pestle in Sawbones’ back-shop: I see!” says Captain Clarence. “He seems a low, vulgar blackguard, that Sawbones.” “Of course, my love; what can you expect from that sort of person?” asks mamma, whose own father was a small attorney, in a small Irish town. “I wish I had his confounded good health,” cries Clarence, coughing. “My poor darling!” says mamma.