The Cornhill Magazine (Vol. I, No. 5, May 1860)Various
General
The Cornhill Magazine (Vol. I, No. 5, May 1860)
Various
England -- Periodicals; English literature -- Periodicals; Short stories, English -- Periodicals
He was a singular man; so humble and meek, so unutterably inefficient
and awkward in the ordinary intercourse of life, but so bold and
enterprising, almost eloquent on the one subject which was the work of
his mind! As he sat there, he looked into his companion’s face from out
his sunken grey eyes with a gaze which made his victim quail. And then
repeated his words: “I now make bold to ask you, Mr. Robarts, whether you
are doing your best to lead such a life as may become a parish clergyman
among his parishioners?” And again he paused for an answer.
“There are but few of us,” said Mark in a low tone, “who could safely
answer that question in the affirmative.”
“But are there many, think you, among us who would find the question so
unanswerable as yourself? And even, were there many, would you, young,
enterprising, and talented as you are, be content to be numbered among
them? Are you satisfied to be a castaway after you have taken upon
yourself Christ’s armour? If you will say so, I am mistaken in you, and
will go my way.” There was again a pause, and then he went on. “Speak
to me, my brother, and open your heart if it be possible.” And rising
from his chair, he walked across the room, and laid his hand tenderly on
Mark’s shoulder.
Mark had been sitting lounging in his chair, and had at first, for a
moment only, thought to brazen it out. But all idea of brazening had
now left him. He had raised himself from his comfortable ease, and was
leaning forward with his elbow on the table; but now, when he heard these
words, he allowed his head to sink upon his arms, and he buried his face
between his hands.
“It is a terrible falling off,” continued Crawley: “terrible in the
fall, but doubly terrible through that difficulty of returning. But it
cannot be that it should content you to place yourself as one among those
thoughtless sinners, for the crushing of whose sin you have been placed
here among them. You become a hunting parson, and ride with a happy mind
among blasphemers and mocking devils—you, whose aspirations were so
high, who have spoken so often and so well of the duties of a minister
of Christ; you, who can argue in your pride as to the petty details
of your church, as though the broad teachings of its great and simple
lessons were not enough for your energies! It cannot be that I have had a
hypocrite beside me in all those eager controversies!”
“Not a hypocrite—not a hypocrite,” said Mark, in a tone which was almost
reduced to sobbing.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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