Male friendship -- Fiction; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; New York (N.Y.) -- Fiction; Young men -- Fiction
Tom was in conflict. “Are you sure--are you sure you are not guilty?”
Words cried to be spoken. He had none.
“Don’t be shocked, Davie,” he spoke at last. “One must meet all
sorts----”
“I am not shocked. But it is strange. He seemed so intelligent a man.”
Tom pounced, with passion of relief.
“He is intelligent, Davie! That is life. You don’t know how life is
lived in New York. There are no sharp distinctions, Davie, between
criminals and honest men....” He stopped. That sounded wrong. He plunged
in, to make it right. “--- What I mean is, the ways allowed by the law
and the other ways--there are conventions, Davie. Now-adays, to get
along, a young man must break in, must break in somehow. Strictly
speaking, that is never quite a righteous----” He stopped again. David
looked with gentle eyes: was Tom pleading, was Tom pleading for Korn or
for another? Tom’s rage came sudden, a birth of weakness....
“Look here,” he attacked him, “what a prig you sometimes seem, man! What
do you know about life? You who have always gone a greased path, sliding
into fortune! Do you think all men have uncles to do the cheating and
the robbing for them?”
David’s fists closed. He held himself.... By God, was Tom right?
Tom felt his victory. He was enraged still more. He struck again. “If we
all had the fat lap of your aunt to coddle us, or the pure lips of your
cousin to teach us love for nothing! Perhaps you think that any man who
hasn’t some one else to lay the dirt for him had better stay under? A
lot you know about life.”
“But Tom----”
“Look about you. I don’t apologize for Korn. He is what he is. He is the
typical social being. Nakedly. The rest of us think we are the pretty
names we are called by.”
He stopped. David was silent. A great fear ran through Tom.
“When you learn, David, to be a man, to give a little understanding--you
may deserve the friend you have.”
Still David looked at him, looked beyond him, searched for a reason. Tom
went out. It was as if the air that enveloped David sucked him backward.
Once more Tom was in his room. Its clear white calm was unbearable to
him. He would be less harried in the dark. He shut off the gas. He flung
himself upon his bed. He could not bear the darkness. He could not bear
the light. Doubtless, next door, David was quietly taking off his
clothes. Slow, slightly puzzled--unbearable David! Oh, he could murder!
He jumped up. Something dim, something gray, something dirty and simple
and soft: this was his need. He rushed down to the street....
* * * * *
Reaction.... Tom was contrite. He watched David sharply, aloofly even,
then did some good thing for him. Some intimate thing none but a loving
eye could have devised: and with a quiet tact. So there was David more
bewildered than before. But not David alone. He understood no less than
Tom. The storm of their relationship seemed moving toward no issue.
David was sick--a little sick.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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