Hadria cast about in her mind for a method of utilizing to the best
advantage possible, the means at her disposal: to force circumstance to
yield a harvest to her will. To be the family consolation meant no light
task, for Mrs. Fullerton was exacting by nature: she had given much, and
she expected much in return. Her logic was somewhat faulty, but that
could not be gracefully pointed out to her by her daughter. Having
allowed her own abilities to decay, Mrs. Fullerton had developed an
extraordinary power of interfering with the employment of the abilities
of others. Hadria had rather underrated than exaggerated this
difficulty. Her mother would keep her for hours, discussing a trivial
point of domestic business, giving elaborate directions about it, only
to do it herself in the end. She spent her whole life in trifles of this
kind, or over social matters. Everything was done cumbrously, with an
incredible amount of toil and consideration, and without any noticeable
results. Hadria, fighting against a multitude of harassing little
difficulties, struggled to turn the long winter months to some use. But
Mrs. Fullerton broke the good serviceable time into jagged fragments.
"I really can't see," said the mother, when the daughter proposed to set
apart certain hours for household duties, and to have other portions of
the day to herself, "I really can't see why a girl's little occupations
should be treated with so much consideration. However, I have no wish
for grudging assistance."
Hadria's temper was far indeed from perfect, and painful scenes often
occurred. But as a rule, she would afterwards be seized with a fit of
remorse, knowing that her mother was suffering bitterly from her keen
disappointment about Algitha. The failure of a life-long hope must try
the endurance of the bravest. Mrs. Fullerton, seeing that Hadria was
more patient, quickly took advantage of the favourable moment, with a
rapid instinct that had often done her good service in the management
of a niggard destiny. The valuable mood must not be allowed to die
fruitless. The elder girl's defection thus became, to the mother, a sort
of investment, bearing interest of docility in the younger. Because the
heartless Algitha had left home, it seemed to Mrs. Fullerton that the
very least that Hadria could do, was to carry out her mother's lightest
wish.
And so the weeks went by, in dreary, troublous fashion, cut into a
hundred little barren segments. The mind had no space, or stretch, or
solitude. It was incessantly harassed, and its impetus was perpetually
checked. But Hadria hoped on. This could not last for ever. Some day,
doubtless, if she sank not in spirit, the stars and the kingdoms would
come.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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