He was seated on some kind of raised chair beneath a canopy. A
carpet ran down over a couple of steps beneath his feet, and
beyond stood the backs of a company of ecclesiastics--secular
priests in cotta, cassock, and biretta, with three or four
bare-footed Franciscans and a couple of Benedictines. Ten yards
away there rose a temporary pulpit with a back and a
sounding-board beneath the open sky; and in it was the tall
figure of a young friar, preaching, it seemed, with extraordinary
fervour. Around the pulpit, beyond it, and on all sides to an
immense distance, so far as he could see, stretched the heads of
an incalculable multitude, dead silent, and beyond them again
trees, green against a blue summer sky.
He looked on all this, but it meant nothing to him. It fitted on
nowhere with his experience; he knew neither where he was, nor at
what he was assisting, nor who these people were, nor who the
friar was, nor who he was himself. He simply looked at his
surroundings, then back at his hands and down his figure.
He gained no knowledge there, for he was dressed as he had never
been dressed before. His caped cassock was black, with purple
buttons and a purple cincture. He noticed that his shoes shone
with gold buckles; he glanced at his breast, but no cross hung
there. He took off his biretta, nervously, lest some one should
notice, and perceived that it was black with a purple tassel. He
was dressed then, it seemed, in the costume of a Domestic
Prelate. He put on his biretta again.
Then he closed his eyes and tried to think; but he could remember
nothing. There was, it seemed, no continuity anywhere. But it
suddenly struck him that if he knew that he was a Domestic
Prelate, and if he could recognize a Franciscan, he must have
seen those phenomena before. Where? When?
Little pictures began to form before him as a result of his
intense mental effort, but they were far away and minute, like
figures seen through the wrong end of a telescope; and they
afforded no explanation. But, as he bent his whole mind upon it,
he remembered that he had been a priest--he had distinct memories
of saying mass. But he could not remember where or when; he could
not even remember his own name.
This last horror struck him alert again. _He did not know who he
was_. He opened his eyes widely, terrified, and caught the eye of
an old priest in cotta and cassock who was looking back at him
over his shoulder. Something in the frightened face must have
disturbed the old man, for he detached himself from the group and
came up the two steps to his side.
"What is it, Monsignor?" he whispered.
"I am ill . . . I am ill . . . father," he stammered.
The priest looked at him doubtfully for an instant.
"Can you . . . can you hold out for a little? The sermon
must be nearly---"
Then the other recovered. He understood that at whatever cost he
must not attract attention. He nodded sharply.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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