English fiction -- 20th century; English wit and humor; Humorous stories, English; Short stories, English; Sports stories
"It's a little difficult to explain, but the idea is this. At most
restaurants you can get a second help of anything for half-price, and
that is technically called a 'follow.' Now, if they didn't give you
a follow, that would be a _Non-sequitur_.... You do see that, don't
you?"
There was a deadly silence.
"Five," I said cheerfully. "The last is _Notting Hill_. I must
confess," I said magnanimously, "that I am a bit doubtful whether you
would actually find Notting Hill in a kitchen."
"You _don't_ say so!"
"Yes. My feeling is that you would be more likely to find the
kitchen in Notting Hill. On the other hand, it is just possible
that, as Calais was found engraven on Mary's heart, so, supposing the
cook died---- Oh, very well. Then it remains at five."
Of course you think that, as I only had five, I came out last. But
you are wrong. There is a pleasing rule in this game that, if you
have any word in your list which somebody else has, you cannot count
it. And as all the others had the obvious things--such as a
nutmeg-grater or a neck of mutton or a nomelette--my five won easily.
And you will note that, if only I had been allowed to count my gnats,
it would have been forty-five.
II. GETTING THE NEEDLE
He was a pale, enthusiastic young man of the name of Simms; and he
held forth to us at great length about his latest hobby.
"Now I'll just show you a little experiment," he wound up; "one that
I have never known to fail. First of all, I want you to hide a
needle somewhere, while I am out of the room. You must stick it
where it can be seen--on a chair--or on the floor if you like. Then
I shall come back and find it."
"Oh, Mr Simms!" we all said.
"Now, which one of you has the strongest will?"
We pushed Jack forward. Jack is at any rate a big man.
"Very well. I shall want you to take my hand when I come in, and
look steadily at the needle, concentrate all your thoughts on it. I,
on the other hand, shall make my mind a perfect blank. Then your
thoughts will gradually pass into my brain, and I shall feel myself
as it were dragged in the direction of the needle."
"And I shall feel myself, as it were, dragged after you?" said Jack.
"Yes; you mustn't put any strain on my arm at all. Let me go just
where I like, only will me to go in the right direction. Now then."
He took out his handkerchief, put it hastily back, and said: "First,
I shall want to borrow a handkerchief or something."
Well, we blindfolded him, and led him out of the room. Then Muriel
got a needle, which, after some discussion, was stuck into the back
of the Chesterfield. Simms returned, and took Jack's left hand.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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