The Days of My Life: An AutobiographyOliphant, Mrs. (Margaret)
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The Days of My Life: An Autobiography
Oliphant, Mrs. (Margaret)
Oliphant, Mrs. (Margaret), 1828-1897
But Alice warned me how late it was, and I had to go upstairs with her
and dress. I cared nothing about my dress. I suffered her to adorn me as
she would. But I would wear no ornaments--not _that_ bracelet, nothing
but the storied and fatal ring. Like a real star it glittered on my
finger--catching the ruddy gleam of the firelight, and shining in the
darkened air of the winter twilight. He could not know this story, and I
could not tell him of it--it was very strange to be so near, yet so far
apart.
When I went down to dinner, Mr. Saville was there. It was a relief, yet
it piqued me that he should ask any one to come on the first day, though
how we could have met alone at table in our sullen estrangement I cannot
tell. The Rector was in a very precise clerical dress, his manners were
a great deal too fine and careful for a man of breeding, and he seemed
to be so much alive to his "position," and so careful to keep it up,
that I perceived at once that he must have been raised to this, and that
he was not a gentleman either by birth or early training. By some
strange logic, I thought of this as an additional offence to me. I did
not care to inquire what my husband's motives had been in giving the
living to this person. I did not take time to think that probably he had
been appointed before Edgar Southcote had conceived his plan for my
deception. I thought he had meant to insult me by surrounding me thus
with his mean relatives, and depriving me even of the comfort of a
suitable neighbor; but I resolved to show him that I was above this
mortification, and all the more freely, because I said nothing to him,
did I converse with the Rector. He told me of the church which wanted
repairs--he said restoration, but I was not acquainted with the
ecclesiastical science so fashionable at the time; he told me that his
sister had begun to embroider a cloth for the altar--that the very
vestments, the sacred vessels for the altar--everything was falling into
decay--that the last rector, "a worthy man, he believed, but lamentably
lax in his church principles," had whitewashed the interior of the
unfortunate church--had barbarously removed the remnants of an ancient
screen of carved stonework--had taken up a mutilated brass in the
chancel, and laid down a plain flag-stone in its stead; which things,
Mr. Saville said pathetically, had so much disgusted the people, that
there really had arisen a dissenting place of worship in this formerly
orthodox village, and his people were led astray from the true path
under his very eyes. Had Mr. Saville told me of an epidemic raging in
Cottisbourne, of some deadly disease abroad, and no one bold enough to
nurse the patients, I should have been more satisfied--but such things
would arise, no doubt; and in the mean time, I should have been glad to
have worked with my own hands at the restorations, if these were
necessary, though, alas! I was disappointed, and could not feel that
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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