New York (State) -- Fiction; West (U.S.) -- Fiction
“I will not heap coals of fire on her head! This letter simply completes
his renunciation, and he meant it for her defense. But when a man signs
himself 'John Hagar' in the handwriting of my father, it shows that
somebody is not telling the truth. I used to pore over the old farm
records in my father's hand at Stone Ridge in the old account books
stowed away in places where a boy loves to poke and pry. I know it as
well as I know yours. Do you suppose she would not know it? When a man
writes as few letters as he does, the handwriting does not change.” Paul
laid the letter upon the coals. “It is the only witness against her, but
it loses the case.”
“She never could have loved him. I never believed she did!” said Moya.
“She thinks she can live out this deep-down, deliberate--But it will
kill her, Moya. Her life is ended from this on. How could I have
driven her to that excruciating choice! I ought to have listened to him
altogether or not at all. There is a hell for meddlers, and the ones who
meddle for conscience' sake are the deepest damned, I think.”
Moya came and wreathed her arm in his, and they paced the room in
silence. At length she said, “If we go to find John Hagar, shall we not
be meddling again? A man who respects a woman's freedom must love his
own. It is the last thing left him. Don't hunt him down. I believe
nothing could hurt him now like seeing you again.”
“He shall not see me unless he wants to, but he shall know where I stand
on this question of the Impostor. It shall be managed so that even he
can see I am protecting her. No, call himself what he will, the tie
between him and me is another of those facts.”
“But do you love him, Paul?”
“Oh--I cannot forget him! He is--just as he used to be--'poor father out
there in the cold.' We must find him and comfort him somehow.”
“For our own peace of mind? Forgive me for arguing when everything is so
difficult. But he is a man--a brave man who would rather be forever out
in the cold than be a burden. Do not rob him of his right to _be_ John
Hagar if he wants to, for the sake of those he loves. You do not tell me
it was love, but I am sure it was, in some mistaken way, that drove him
into exile. Only love as pure as his can be our excuse for dragging him
back. He did not want shelter and comfort from her. Only one thing. Have
we got that to give him?”
“Well then, I go for my own sake--it is a physical necessity; and I go
for hers. She has put it out of her own power to help him. It will ease
her a little to know I am trying to reach him in his forlorn disguise.”
“But you were not going to tell her?”
“In words, no. But she will understand. There is a strange clairvoyance
between us, as if we were accomplices in a crime!”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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