The Desultory Man: Collection of Ancient and Modern British Novels and Romances. Vol. CXLVII.James, G. P. R. (George Payne Rainsford)
General
The Desultory Man: Collection of Ancient and Modern British Novels and Romances. Vol. CXLVII.
James, G. P. R. (George Payne Rainsford)
Fiction
The very mention of those days calls up again to view the events they
brought with them, almost as vividly as at the time. In solitude and
silence the images of a thousand things, gone for ever, come back upon
my mind. The past alone is ours; it is our grand possession in the
wilderness of time; it is all that we call our own. Memory fixes her
eyes ever upon it, like a miser watching his treasure, and culls out
the brightest recollections, to place them at the top of her store.
Fancy seeks there for many of the materials for the gay fabrics of
imagination; and wisdom, too, borrows from the past to provide against
the future. Pilgrims as we are, wandering on towards a distant shrine,
over a rough and painful road, let us pluck the wild blossoms that
grow by the road to deck our pillow, ere we lay down to rest; and
though perhaps we can neither give to our own tale, or to that of
others, the same interest with which we have felt or have listened,
still let us gather up, ere it fades into forgetfulness, all that the
old reaper Time lets fall upon our path.
I know not well whether I write for myself or others: whether these
pages will alone serve to recall to my own mind, in after years,
events and tales that are now vivid, but may then be partly effaced
from the tablet of memory; or whether they will afford some amusement
and some instruction to persons who neither know the writer nor are
acquainted with his history. Lest the latter should be the case, I
write the following sketch of my early years:
My name, then, is James Young, and I was born the second son of an
officer in the navy, who had fought in the battle which destroyed the
fleet of Llangara, and in that which immortalized the name of Rodney,
who gained honour and glory, but little worldly wealth; and died in
battle when I had reached the age of eight years, leaving an income of
about twelve hundred per annum for the support of his widow and two
children. I remember well, even at this moment, the people telling me
that my father was dead, and endeavouring to explain to me what death
is. But though I could understand that I should never see my parent
again, and wept bitterly to think that it was so, yet I could not get
my mind to grasp the meaning of being dead, till an accidental
occurrence, which took place a few weeks after the news of my father's
death had reached England, gave me the first tangible idea of death,
and filled me with awe and horror. I had gone out with my brother, who
was five or six years older than myself, and was walking on with him
rapidly towards Hyde Park, when at the corner of Grosvenor Square we
saw a crowd gathered round the step of a door, which I think at that
time belonged to the house of Admiral Berkeley. With boyish curiosity
we pressed near, and I heard some one say as we approached, "Oh! the
man is dead, quite dead, you had better get a shutter, and carry the
body to the workhouse."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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