I wrote then my best pages, a treatise on the working of the will
during sleep. I put into it, with the delight of a savant which you
will understand, all the details which I had noted, for some months,
on the goings and comings, the heights and depths of my resolutions.
I had kept, as I have told you, a most precise journal, analyzing, in
the evening before going to sleep, and in the morning, as soon as I was
awake, the least shades of every state of mind.
Yes, these were days of a singular fullness. I was very free. Mlle.
Largeyx and Sister Anaclet kept the marquise company. My pupil and I
took advantage of the beautiful and mild days for walking. Under the
pretext of teaching I had cultivated in him a love of butterflies.
Armed with a long cane and a net of green gauze, he constantly ran
after the Auroras with wings bordered with orange, the blue Arguses,
the brown Morio’s, the mottled Vulcans and the gold-colored Citrons. He
left me alone with my thoughts.
Sometimes we took the Pradat road which was now adorned with all the
verdure of spring, sometimes we went toward Verneuge, toward the valley
of Saint-Genès-Champanelle, which is as gracefully pretty as its name.
I would seat myself upon a block of lava, some small fragment of the
enormous stream poured out by the Puy de la Vache, and there, without
troubling my head about Lucien, I abandoned myself to this strange
disposition which has always appeared to me in the midst of this savage
nature, as a striking symbol of my doctrines, a type of implacable
fatality, a council of absolute indifference to good or ill.
I looked at the leaves of the trees as they unfolded in the sunlight,
and I recalled the known laws of vegetable respiration, and how, by a
simple modification of light, the life of the plant can be changed. In
the same way, one ought to be able at will to direct the life of the
soul, if he could exactly know its laws.
I had already succeeded in creating the commencement of a passion in
the soul of a young girl, separated from me by an abyss. What new
procedures applied with rigor would permit me to increase the intensity
of this passion?
I forgot the magnificence of the heavens, the freshness of the wood,
the majesty of the volcanoes, the vast landscape spread out before
me, in seeing only the formulas of moral algebra. I hesitated between
diverse solutions for the next day on which I should have Mlle. de
Jussat face to face with me in the solitude of the château.
Ought I on her return to feign indifference, to disconcert her, to
subdue her, first by astonishment and then by self-love and grief?
Should I pique her jealousy by insinuating that the foreigner of my
_soi-disant_ romance had returned to Clermont and had written to
me? Should I, on the contrary, continue the burning declarations, the
audacities which surround, the follies which intoxicate?
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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