He got out of bed with a certain slow dignity and stepped into his
cold bath solemnly, as into a font of regeneration. And as he bathed
he still rehearsed with brilliance his appointed part. No criticism of
the performance was offered by his actual self as revealed to him in
the looking-glass. It stared at him with an abstracted air,
conspicuous in the helpless pathos of its nakedness. It affected
absorption in the intricate evolutions of the bath. Something in its
manner inspired him with a vague distrust. He noticed that this
morning it soaped itself with a peculiar care, that it displayed more
than usual interest in the trivial details of dress. It rejected an
otherwise irreproachable shirt because of a minute wine stain on the
cuff. It sniffed critically at its coat and trousers, and flung them
to the other end of the room. It arrayed itself finally in a brand-new
suit of grey flannel, altogether inexpressive of his rôle. He could
not but feel that its behaviour compromised the dignity of the
character he had determined to represent. It is not in his best coat
and trousers that the book-dealer sets out on the dusty quest of the
Aldine Plato and the Neapolitan Horace and the _Aurea Legenda_ of
Wynkyn de Worde.
He could no longer conceal the fact that he had dressed himself
elaborately for an interview with Miss Harden. But he endeavoured to
adjust his mind to a new and less disturbing view of the lady. He had
seen her last night through a flush of emotion that obscured her; he
would see her to-day in the pure and imperturbable light of the
morning, and his nerves should not play the devil with him this time.
He would be cool, calm, incorruptibly impersonal, as became Rickman,
the man of business, Rickman of Rickman's.
Unfortunately, though the rôle was rehearsed with ease in the privacy
of his bedroom, it proved impossible to sustain it under Miss Harden's
candid eyes. At the first sight of them he lost all grasp and memory
of his part; he broke down disgracefully, miserably. The sound of her
voice revived his agony of the previous night. True, the flush of
emotion had subsided, but in the fierce intellectual light that
followed, his doubts and scruples showed plainer than ever. They even
acquired a certain logical order and cohesion.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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