"I see it in your face," he answered, lowering his voice, though he knew
Olivia could not tell what we were saying. "Your marriage with
mademoiselle your cousin was broken off--why? Do you suppose I did not
guess? I knew it from the first-week you stayed with us. Nobody could
see mam'zelle as we see her, without loving her."
"The Sark folks say you are in love with her yourself, Tardif," I said,
almost against my will, and certainly without any intention beforehand
of giving expression to such a rumor.
His lips contracted and his face saddened, but he met my eyes frankly.
"It is true," he answered; "but what then? If it had only pleased God to
make me like you, or that she should be of my class, I would have done
my utmost to win her. But that is impossible! See, I am nothing else
than a servant in her eyes. I do not know how to be any thing else, and
I am content. She is as far above my reach as one of the white clouds up
yonder. To think of myself as any thing but her servant would be
irreligious."
"You are a good fellow, Tardif," I exclaimed.
"God is the judge, of that," he said, with a sigh. "Mam'zelle thinks of
me only as her servant. 'My good Tardif, do this, or do that.' I like
it. I do not know any happier moment than when I hold her little boots
in my hand and brush them. You see she is as helpless and tender as my
little wife was; but she is very much higher than my poor little wife.
Yes, I love her as I love the blue sky, and the white clouds and the
stars shining in the night. But it will be quite different between her
and you."
"I hope so," I thought to myself.
"You do not feel like a servant," he continued, his oars dipping a
little too deeply and setting the boat a-rocking. "By-and-by, when you
are married, she will look up to you and obey you. I do not understand
altogether why the good God has made this difference between us two; but
I see it and feel it. It would be fitting for you to be her husband; it
would be a shame to her to become my wife."
"Are you grieved about it, Tardif?" I asked.
"No, no," he answered; "we have always been good friends, you and I,
doctor. No, you shall marry her, and I will be happy. I will come to
visit you sometimes, and she will call me her good Tardif. That is
enough for me."
"What are you talking about?" asked Olivia. It was impossible to tell
her, or to continue the conversation. Moreover, the narrow channel
between Breckhou and Sark is so strong in its current, that it required
both caution and skill to steer the boat amid the needle-like points of
the rocks. At last we gained one of the entrances to the caves, but we
could not pull the boat quite up to the strand. A few paces of shallow
water, clear as glass, with pebbles sparkling like gems beneath it, lay
between us and the caves.
"Tardif," I said, "you need not wait for us. We will return by the
cliffs."
"You know the Gouliot Caves as well as I do?" he replied, though in a
doubtful tone.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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