got home, he took refuge in his room up-stairs, in the hazy atmosphere
drugged with the heavy fumes of his pipe, and stretched his slovenly
limbs on his sofa, and buried his confused faculties in his old novel.
So he lived day by day, circumscribed in the most dangerous of his
indulgences by Nettie's unhesitating strictures and rules, which nobody
dared break, but unlimited in his indolence, his novel, and his pipe.
That stifling fire, that close room, the ashes of the pipe on the table,
the listless shabby figure on the sofa, were the most dismal part of the
interior at St Roque's Cottage, so far as it appeared to the external
eye. But it is doubtful whether Mrs Fred, spiteful and useless, with
her poor health, her selfish love, her utter unreason, dawdling over
trifling matters which she never completed; or the three children,
entirely unrespectful of father and mother, growing up amid that wonderful
subversion of the ordinary rules of nature, with some loyalty to Nettie,
but no reverence in them, were not as appalling companions to live with.
Nettie, however, did not consider the matter as a spectator might. She
did not enter into it at all as a matter to be criticised; they simply
belonged to her as they were. She knew their faults without loving them
less, or feeling it possible that faults could make any difference to
those bonds of nature. Fred, indeed, did afflict her lively impatient
spirit;--she had tried to quicken him into life at first--she gave him
up with a certain frank scorn now, and accepted her position. Thus he
was to be all his life long this big cumberer of the ground. Nettie,
valorous and simple, made up her mind to it. He was Fred--that was all
that could be said on the subject; and, being Fred, belonged to her, and
had to be cared for like the rest.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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