Adventure stories; Fiction; Mystery fiction; Short stories
‘Such is the fact. I am, dear boy, on my last legs,’ said Challoner.
‘Besides the clothes in which you see me, I have scarcely a decent
trouser in my wardrobe; and if I knew how, I would this instant set about
some sort of work or commerce. With a hundred pounds for capital, a man
should push his way.’
‘It may be,’ returned Somerset; ‘but what to do with mine is more than I
can fancy. Mr. Godall,’ he added, addressing the salesman, ‘you are a
man who knows the world: what can a young fellow of reasonable education
do with a hundred pounds?’
‘It depends,’ replied the salesman, withdrawing his cheroot. ‘The power
of money is an article of faith in which I profess myself a sceptic. A
hundred pounds will with difficulty support you for a year; with somewhat
more difficulty you may spend it in a night; and without any difficulty
at all you may lose it in five minutes on the Stock Exchange. If you are
of that stamp of man that rises, a penny would be as useful; if you
belong to those that fall, a penny would be no more useless. When I was
myself thrown unexpectedly upon the world, it was my fortune to possess
an art: I knew a good cigar. Do you know nothing, Mr. Somerset?’
‘Not even law,’ was the reply.
‘The answer is worthy of a sage,’ returned Mr. Godall. ‘And you, sir,’
he continued, turning to Challoner, ‘as the friend of Mr. Somerset, may I
be allowed to address you the same question?’
‘Well,’ replied Challoner, ‘I play a fair hand at whist.’
‘How many persons are there in London,’ returned the salesman, ‘who have
two-and-thirty teeth? Believe me, young gentleman, there are more still
who play a fair hand at whist. Whist, sir, is wide as the world; ’tis an
accomplishment like breathing. I once knew a youth who announced that he
was studying to be Chancellor of England; the design was certainly
ambitious; but I find it less excessive than that of the man who aspires
to make a livelihood by whist.’
‘Dear me,’ said Challoner, ‘I am afraid I shall have to fall to be a
working man.’
‘Fall to be a working man?’ echoed Mr. Godall. ‘Suppose a rural dean to
be unfrocked, does he fall to be a major? suppose a captain were
cashiered, would he fall to be a puisne judge? The ignorance of your
middle class surprises me. Outside itself, it thinks the world to lie
quite ignorant and equal, sunk in a common degradation; but to the eye of
the observer, all ranks are seen to stand in ordered hierarchies, and
each adorned with its particular aptitudes and knowledge. By the defects
of your education you are more disqualified to be a working man than to
be the ruler of an empire. The gulf, sir, is below; and the true learned
arts—those which alone are safe from the competition of insurgent
laymen—are those which give his title to the artisan.’
‘This is a very pompous fellow,’ said Challoner, in the ear of his
companion.
‘He is immense,’ said Somerset.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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