DICAEOPOLIS. May I die if I believe a word of what you tell us! Excepting the grasshoppers, there is not a grain of truth in it all! THEORUS. And he has sent you the most warlike soldiers of all Thrace. DICAEOPOLIS. Now we shall begin to see clearly. HERALD. Come hither, Thracians, whom Theorus brought. DICAEOPOLIS. What plague have we here? THEORUS. 'Tis the host of the Odomanti.[175] DICAEOPOLIS. Of the Odomanti? Tell me what it means. Who has mutilated their tools like this? THEORUS. If they are given a wage of two drachmae, they will put all Boeotia[176] to fire and sword. DICAEOPOLIS. Two drachmae to those circumcised hounds! Groan aloud, ye people of rowers, bulwark of Athens! Ah! great gods! I am undone; these Odomanti are robbing me of my garlic![177] Will you give me back my garlic? THEORUS. Oh! wretched man! do not go near them; they have eaten garlic.[178] DICAEOPOLIS. Prytanes, will you let me be treated in this manner, in my own country and by barbarians? But I oppose the discussion of paying a wage to the Thracians; I announce an omen; I have just felt a drop of rain.[179] HERALD. Let the Thracians withdraw and return the day after to-morrow; the Prytanes declare the sitting at an end. DICAEOPOLIS. Ye gods, what garlic I have lost! But here comes Amphitheus returned from Lacedaemon. Welcome, Amphitheus. AMPHITHEUS. No, there is no welcome for me and I fly as fast as I can, for I am pursued by the Acharnians. DICAEOPOLIS. Why, what has happened? AMPHITHEUS. I was hurrying to bring your treaty of truce, but some old dotards from Acharnae[180] got scent of the thing; they are veterans of Marathon, tough as oak or maple, of which they are made for sure--rough and ruthless. They all set to a-crying, "Wretch! you are the bearer of a treaty, and the enemy has only just cut our vines!" Meanwhile they were gathering stones in their cloaks, so I fled and they ran after me shouting. DICAEOPOLIS. Let 'em shout as much as they please! But have you brought me a treaty? AMPHITHEUS. Most certainly, here are three samples to select from,[181] this one is five years old; take it and taste. DICAEOPOLIS. Faugh! AMPHITHEUS. Well? DICAEOPOLIS. It does not please me; it smells of pitch and of the ships they are fitting out.[182] AMPHITHEUS. Here is another, ten years old; taste it. DICAEOPOLIS. It smells strongly of the delegates, who go round the towns to chide the allies for their slowness.[183] AMPHITHEUS. This last is a truce of thirty years, both on sea and land. DICAEOPOLIS. Oh! by Bacchus! what a bouquet! It has the aroma of nectar and ambrosia; this does not say to us, "Provision yourselves for three days." But it lisps the gentle numbers, "Go whither you will."[184] I accept it, ratify it, drink it at one draught and consign the Acharnians to limbo. Freed from the war and its ills, I shall keep the Dionysia[185] in the country. AMPHITHEUS. And I shall run away, for I'm mortally afraid of the Acharnians.