"He is pursued by a fate," murmured the listener.
"Listen to my defence;" said Cecily, after a pause, with more
earnestness. "For I have not been blameless throughout. Before we left
London, he charged me with contributing to what had befallen us, and in
a measure he was right. He said that I had made no effort to keep him
faithful to me that I had watched the gulf growing between us with
indifference, and allowed him to take his own course. A jealous and
complaining wife, he said, would have behaved more for his good.
Hearing this, I recognized its truth. I had held myself too little
responsible. When our life in Paris began, I resolved that I would
accept my duties in another spirit I did all that a wife can do to
strengthen the purer part in him. I interested myself in whatever he
undertook; I suggested subjects of study which I thought congenial to
him and studied them together with him, putting aside everything of my
own for which he did not care. And for a time I was encouraged by
seeming success. He was grateful to me, and I found my one pleasure in
this absolute devotion of myself. I choose my words carefully; you must
not imagine that there was more in either his feeling or mine than what
I express. But it did not last more than six months. Then he grew tired
of it. I still did my utmost; believe that I did, Mrs. Spence, for it
is indeed true. I made every effort in my power to prevent what I knew
was threatening. Until he began to practise deceit, trickery of every
kind. What more could I do? If he was determined to deceive me, he
would do so; what was gained by my obliging him to exert more cunning?
Then I turned sick at heart, and the end came."
"But, Cecily," said Eleanor, "how can the end be yet?"
"You mean that he will once more wish to return."
"Once more, or twenty times more."
"I know; but--"
She broke off, and Eleanor did not press her to continue.
It was not long before the news reached Miriam. In a few days Eleanor
paid one of her accustomed visits to a little house out at Roehampton,
externally cold and bare enough in these days of November, but inwardly
rich with whatsoever the heart or brain can desire. Hither came no
payers of formal calls, no leavers of cards, no pests from the humdrum
world to open their mouths and utter foolishness. It was a dwelling
sacred to love and art, and none were welcome across its threshold save
those to whom the consecration was of vital significance. To Eleanor
the air seemed purer than that of any other house she entered; to
breathe it made her heart beat more hopefully, gave her a keener relish
of life.
Mallard was absent to-day, held by business in London. The visitor had,
for once, no wish to await his return. She sat for an hour by the
fireside, and told what she had to tell; then took her leave.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account