British -- Italy -- Fiction; Domestic fiction; Female friendship -- Fiction; Italy -- Fiction; Love stories
She was unable to look the vicar in the face. He did not know, nobody
knew, what she was going to do, and from the very beginning she was
unable to look anybody in the face. She excused herself from making
speeches appealing for money. How could she stand up and ask people for
money when she herself was spending so much on her own selfish
pleasure? Nor did it help her or quiet her that, having actually told
Frederick, in her desire to make up for what she was squandering, that
she would be grateful if he would let her have some money, he instantly
gave her a cheque for £100. He asked no questions. She was scarlet. He
looked at her a moment and then looked away. It was a relief to
Frederick that she should take some money. She gave it all immediately
to the organisation she worked with, and found herself more tangled in
doubts than ever.
Mrs. Wilkins, on the contrary, had no doubts. She was quite certain
that it was a most proper thing to have a holiday, and altogether right
and beautiful to spend one’s own hard-collected savings on being happy.
“Think how much nicer we shall be when we come back,” she said to Mrs.
Arbuthnot, encouraging that pale lady.
No, Mrs. Wilkins had no doubts, but she had fears; and March was for
her too an anxious month, with the unconscious Mr. Wilkins coming back
daily to his dinner and eating his fish in the silence of imagined
security.
Also things happen so awkwardly. It really is astonishing, how
awkwardly they happen. Mrs. Wilkins, who was very careful all this
month to give Mellersh only the food he liked, buying it and hovering
over its cooking with a zeal more than common, succeeded so well that
Mellersh was pleased; definitely pleased; so much pleased that he began
to think that he might, after all, have married the right wife instead
of, as he had frequently suspected, the wrong one. The result was that
on the third Sunday in the month—Mrs. Wilkins had made up her trembling
mind that on the fourth Sunday, there being five in that March and
it being on the fifth of them that she and Mrs. Arbuthnot were to
start, she would tell Mellersh of her invitation—on the third Sunday,
then, after a very well-cooked lunch in which the Yorkshire pudding
had melted in his mouth and the apricot tart had been so perfect that
he ate it all, Mellersh, smoking his cigar by the brightly burning
fire the while hail gusts banged on the window, said: “I am thinking
of taking you to Italy for Easter.” And paused for her astounded and
grateful ecstasy.
None came. The silence in the room, except for the hail hitting the
windows and the gay roar of the fire, was complete. Mrs. Wilkins could
not speak. She was dumbfounded. The next Sunday was the day she had
meant to break her news to him, and she had not yet even prepared the
form of words in which she would break it.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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