The English Rogue: Described in the Life of Meriton Latroon, a Witty ExtravagantHead, Richard
General
The English Rogue: Described in the Life of Meriton Latroon, a Witty Extravagant
Head, Richard
Rogues and vagabonds -- England -- Fiction
He is Gentleman I assure you well extracted, which once lived like a
Salamander in the midst of the flames; and had he not been burnt, he
have never proved sound. He seems a Prodigy: For that which we live by,
decays him; hating Air, as _Bacchus_ hates small Beer. He will lie still
if you smother him, and is never so well, as when his breath is stopt.
Bury him, and you make him quicker. As for his habit, it is ever plain,
yet neat: Though Nobly born, he scorns not to wear a green Coat, with a
badge on it; and you cannot injure him worse than to pick a hole in his
Coat. Though he wears for the most part one sort of Garb, yet he is
never out of fashion, acceptable to the best of company, not regarding
his outward dress, but valuing his inward worth: However, his Suit is
made of admirable Stuff, for his outside never grows barer, and his
Linings are the fresher for wearing. So choice he is in his Cloathing,
that he rather chuseth to have his brains knockt out, than to have a
rent in his Garment. He wears an _a la mode_ Hat, as light (and almost
as little) as a Shittle-cock, which he puts off to none; but like the
Quaker when brought before a Magistrate, hath it taken off for him.
As for his Pedegree, I now not how to derive it; for he hath had in him
the best and purest of the _French_ blood, but will now acknowledge his
Race onely from the _Spaniard_, whom he imitates, being stately, and
standing always upright; treads for the most part on Carpets, and never
stirs abroad but when he is carried, yet full of activity. If he runs
fast and long, the more wind he gets. If he chance to fall, which is
seldom, for many look to him, he will be extreamly moved, yet (contrary
to all men) the fuller his belly is, the less hurt he receives: his
credit is large, never paying for what he wears, running on the score
perpetually; his conditions are a riddle, there is in him pure vertue,
and notorious vice; the quintessence of love, and the venome of hatred.
He is the beginning and the end of a thousand quarrels in a year, yet a
very Coward; for he suffers any to take him by the ear, and never broke
any ones pate, but when company was by. He is very facetious in society,
and will spend himself freely to the last drop, if a Ladies soft and
warm hand will raise him. He is a brisk Spark, and therefore Courtiers
adore him; he is smooth in his expression, and therefore Ladies delight
in him; he is filled with nimble fancies, therefore the Wits frequent
him, exhausting his radical moisture, to distil it into Poetical
Raptures; for conceits never run faster from the Limbick of their
brains, than when this Gentleman adds fuel to the Furnace. He whets wit,
yet dulls it; creates new Fancies, and stupifies. Gives the Orator a
fluent tongue, and makes him speechless. Gives a Poet feet till he
cannot go. And as he helps Ministers to preach, so he likewise silenceth
more than the Spanish Inquisition. He hath a great many tricks in him:
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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