Dull-headed fool apprehended me not, but began to be angry, telling me, _His Trade was a good Trade, and I need not undervalue it_. I told him, _I did not, since there was some analogy between my Trade and his. Why what Trade are you?_ (said he,) _(I may ask you a question, as well as you me.)_ I replyed, _That I was a Cuckold-maker. How can that be like my Profession?_ quoth he. _In this_, said I, _You dress the skins, and I trim the Horns._ The Bawd at this fell into such an extream fit of laughter, that down fell her Pipe, and up came the Strong-waters that she had swallowed: but that was not all, for having not her retentive faculty, she let flie: surely she was overcharged, which made her recoyl, and so blew out her breech-pin. She was forced to leave us, and about an hour after returned; how sweet, I cannot tell you. We fell into discourse again: I askt her, _How long she had liv’d in this house? Two years_ (said she) _a longer time then any house I have lived in this twenty years_: with that I concluded she was in fee with the Justices Clerk. My stomach being waterish, I would needs have some Eggs and Bacon: but Lord, what an Agony the hearing thereof put the Bawd in! desiring me to desist, for she should die at the sight of them. I askt her the reason: _O_, said she, _it puts me in mind of one _Shrove-tuesday_ especially, on which the Apprentices pulled down my house; and sick, sick as I was, pulled me away violently from a Caudle I had prepared to comfort me: But they gave me one with a Pox to them, and the Devils Dam take the Rotten Eggs in it, with which I thought they would have pelted out my brains, after they had dragged me sufficiently, and worried me (as a Mastiff would a Cat) till they were weary of the sport: fearing I should catch cold, they out of pity covered me warm in a Bogg-house. But the worst was, after this kind usage, I was to go through a long street before I could come to an acquaintance of mine wherein I could safely secure my self from the out-rage of these Hell-hounds. All along as I went, a thousand Dogs barkt at me, the street was filled with people looking and laughing at my sad disaster, but none daring to come near me. They say I left so strong a scent behind me, that several of the Inhabitants left their dwellings upon it, and that the strong savour remained in that place above six days._ I seemed to pitty her much, promising to visit her often; and so we left her. [Illustration] CHAP. XIII. _What a Trick he served his Comrade; how himself was Trapan’d; his own Cloaths taken from him; the Bawd out of pretended pity, invested him with an old petticoat and wastcoat; his admittance into a Boarding-School; his getting many of the Gentlewomen with Child; his discovery, and his flight._