The English Rogue: Described in the Life of Meriton Latroon, a Witty ExtravagantHead, Richard
General
The English Rogue: Described in the Life of Meriton Latroon, a Witty Extravagant
Head, Richard
Rogues and vagabonds -- England -- Fiction
From one Bawdy-house to another, was our dayly Travel, still finding out
some variety that might please us. About the twylight, coming along by a
well-built house, I saw a Gentlewoman richly Attired standing by the
door, who, as I passed by, very civilly saluted me, and so withdrew her
self. I followed her in, as very well understanding how to interpret
such actions. She brought us into a spacious Inner-room, and then with
much civility and good carriage, invited us to sit down. She called to
her servant to bring some bottles of Wine, resolving to make us pay
dearly for her extraordinary Favours. By our habits she took us for no
less then persons of Quality; for we had gallantly accoutred our selves;
and I thought that Fortune now had designed me her chiefest favorite, in
throwing this unexpected blessing upon me. She caused her Lute to be
brought her, to which she sung so harmonically, that the Musick of the
Sphears are no more to be compared to it, then a Scotch Bagpipe to an
Organ. This so intoxicated my Comrade, with the Wine together (not but
that they had a great operation on my self) that he fell fast asleep,
(_alias_ dead drunk.) Glad I was to my very heart of this accident,
fearing he might be a Rival in my intention: and to the intent I might
remove all _Remora’s_ or Impediments that might hinder my sole enjoyment
of this Lady, I consulted with my self what to do with him: I was not
long about it, but streight found out this cunning Plot, which was to
send him home to his Master. Love to a Woman is so forceable, that what
will it not do? to sum up all, make a man betray his Friend. I made an
Apology to the Gentlewoman for his incivility, and requested the favour
to have her servant procure me a Porter; whilst she was gone to execute
my desires, I searcht his Pockets, and took away all his Gold; for we
had converted all our money into that metal, which we always made our
_Vade mecum_. To ingratiate my self with this Gentlewoman, I acquainted
her with my design; which she heartily laughed at. I farther desired of
her, that I might have a Card and a piece of paper. On the Card I wrote
a superscription, and pinned it on his back, directing the thing to his
Master, living in such a place: with the paper, I wrote a Letter to him
to this effect.
_SIR,
Lately I found your Goose upon the way,
I took him up, as one that went astray.
To recompense my pains, I pull’d his feathers;
Such pretious down will warm me in all weathers.
His flesh I love not; it belongs to you:
The gibblets though I keep; and so adieu._
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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