In discourses such as these the hours passed away; and though there was
nothing in the light of this sunless region to mark to the eye the decline
of day, my own feelings told me that the night drew near;—nor, in spite of
my incredulity, could I refrain from a flutter of hope, as that promised
moment of revelation approached, when the Mystery of Mysteries was to be
made all my own. This consummation, however, was less near than I
expected. My patience had still further trials to encounter. It was
necessary, I now found, that I should keep watch, during the greater part
of the night, in the Sanctuary of the Temple, alone and in darkness,—and
thus prepare myself, by meditation, for the awful moment, when the
irradiation from behind the sacred Veils was to burst upon me.
At the appointed hour, we left the Hall of the Zodiac, and proceeded
through a line of long marble galleries, where the lamps were more thinly
scattered as we advanced, till, at length, we found ourselves in total
darkness. Here the Priest, taking me by the hand, and leading me down a
flight of steps, into a place where the same deep gloom prevailed, said,
with a voice trembling, as if from excess of awe,—“Thou art now in the
Sanctuary of our goddess, Isis, and the dark veils, that hang over her
image, are before thee!”
After exhorting me earnestly to that train of thought, which best accorded
with the spirit of the place where I stood, and, above all, to that full
and unhesitating faith, with which alone, he said, the manifestation of
such mysteries should be approached, the holy man took leave of me, and
re‐ascended the steps;—while, so spell‐bound did I feel by that deep
darkness, that the last sound of his footsteps died upon my ear, before I
ventured to stir a limb from the position in which he had left me.
The prospect of the long watch, now before me, was dreadful. Even danger
itself, in an active form, would have been preferable to this sort of
safe, but dull, probation, by which patience was the only virtue put to
the proof. Having ascertained how far the space around me was free from
obstacles, I endeavoured to beguile the time by pacing up and down within
those limits, till I became tired of the echoes of my own tread. Finding
my way, then, to what I felt to be a massive pillar, and, leaning wearily
against it, I surrendered myself to a train of thoughts and feelings, far
different from those with which the Hierophant had hoped to inspire me.
“Why,” I again asked, “if these priests possess the secret of life, why
are they themselves the victims of death? why sink into the grave with the
cup of immortality in their hands? But no, safe boasters, the eternity
they so lavishly promise is reserved for _another_, a future world—that
ready resource of all priestly promises—that depository of the airy
pledges of all creeds. Another world!—alas, where does it lie? or, what
spirit hath ever come to say that Life is there?”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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