In this mode of existence did I pass some days;—my mornings devoted to
reading, my nights to listening, under the canopy of heaven, to the holy
eloquence of Melanius. The perseverance with which I enquired, and the
quickness with which I learned, soon succeeded in deceiving my benevolent
instructor, who mistook curiosity for zeal and knowledge for belief. Alas!
cold, and barren, and earthly was that knowledge,—the word, without the
spirit, the shape, without the life. Even when, as a relief from
hypocrisy, I persuaded myself that I believed, it was but a brief
delusion, a faith, whose hope crumbled at the touch,—like the fruit of the
desert‐shrub, shining and empty!
But, though my soul was still dark, the good Hermit saw not into its
depths. The very facility of my belief, which might have suggested some
doubt of its sincerity, was but regarded by his innocent zeal, as a more
signal triumph of the truth. His own ingenuousness led him to a ready
trust in others; and the examples of such conversion as that of the
philosopher, Justin, who received the light into his soul during a walk by
the sea‐shore, had prepared him for illuminations of the spirit, even more
rapid than mine.
During this time, I neither saw nor heard of Alethe;—nor could my patience
have endured so long a privation, had not those mute vestiges of her
presence, that welcomed me every night on my return, made me feel that I
was still living under her gentle influence, and that her sympathy hung
round every step of my progress. Once, too, when I ventured to speak her
name to Melanius, though he answered not my enquiry, there was a smile, I
thought, of promise upon his countenance, which love, more alive than
faith, interpreted as it wished.
At length,—it was on the sixth or seventh evening of my solitude, when I
lay resting at the door of my cave, alter the study of the day,—I was
startled by hearing my name called loudly from the opposite rocks, and
looking up, saw, on the cliff near the deserted grottos, Melanius and—oh,
I could not doubt—my Alethe by his side!
Though I had never ceased, since the first night of my return from the
desert, to flatter myself with the fancy that I was still living in her
presence, the actual sight of her again made me feel what an age we had
been separated. She was clothed all in white, and, as she stood in the
last remains of the sunshine, appeared to my too prophetic fancy like a
parting spirit, whose last footsteps on earth that glory encircled.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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