Italy -- Fiction; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; New York (N.Y.) -- Fiction; Violinists -- Fiction
She turned to leave the room, but before she could stop him he drew her
hand to his lips and kissed the palm passionately and with reverence.
The next day he was so much better that he was allowed to sit up in bed
and dictate to Regina as to the proper disposal of the contents of his
suitcase which Anne's chauffeur had packed and brought down from the hut
before leaving for New York. Attired in a pair of his own pajamas, hair
brushed, face and hands washed by the delighted and flustered old woman,
Alexis was seriously contemplating a shave, when at the bottom of the
suitcase beneath some silk socks he came upon Claire's picture.
He drew it out slowly, an expression of shrinking upon his face. Where
had it come from? He certainly would never consciously have packed it
among his things. And neither would his mother have done so. The girl
herself, pitiful, sentimental little fool must have secreted it among
his things hoping that he would come upon it, and perhaps cast her a
random thought, as one throws a bone to a dog. For Claire was like a
dog, with the same beseeching, tragic gaze that looked up at him now
from the photograph so reproachfully. A tremor of rage swept over him as
he met those wistful eyes. Damn it, what right had she to reproach him
and to look so woebegone! As if he, Alexis, were to blame for
everything. Hadn't she fallen in with his mother's plans with alacrity,
with indecency even? Yes, they had tricked him nicely between them.
Claire's visit to his room in the dead of night and his mother's
neatly-timed discovery, and accusations. What else had there been to do
after that, but to marry the girl though they were both innocent even in
thought? No, Claire had no right to reproach him, for she had deceived
him, too. His mother, for her own cryptic purposes and Claire in
self-deluded passion. He had done the only thing possible under the
circumstances. Was it his fault that he had never been able to love her?
He had told her so from the beginning, hadn't he? She had nothing to
complain of. If he had neglected her, he at least had been faithful in a
technical sense. What mattered it if the faithfulness had proceeded from
indifference, rather than from a sense of strict virtue? The fact
remained, he had been faithful. And to what? A tool of his insatiable
mother; a toy thrown to serve as outlet for hitherto-repressed physical
desires; a stuffed doll to appease nascent passion.
He threw the picture from him with a savage gesture and laughed aloud,
much to Regina's alarm. She hastened to his side.
"The signorino is feeling gay?" she said hopefully, but with a tinge of
suspicion. The young man's expression was anything but gay! "Shall I
call my signora?"
He looked at the woman oddly.
"Please do," he mocked. "I want her to laugh with me!"
His wild look frightened the woman, she ran out of the room, and
presently Anne came in.
"Do you want me?" she asked quietly, with a quick glance at his excited
face.
He nodded grimly.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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