The Expedition of Humphry ClinkerSmollett, T. (Tobias)
General
The Expedition of Humphry Clinker
Smollett, T. (Tobias)
Epistolary fiction; Great Britain -- Fiction; Travelers -- Fiction
My uncle hearing the noise, came in, and being informed of this
adventure, began to comfort Mr Oneale for the lady’s elopement;
observing that he seemed to have had a lucky escape, that it was better
she should elope before, than after marriage--The Hibernian was of a
very different opinion. He said, ‘If he had been once married, she might
have eloped as soon as she pleased; he would have taken care that she
should not have carried her fortune along with her--Ah (said he) she’s
a Judas Iscariot, and has betrayed me with a kiss; and, like Judas, she
carried the bag, and has not left me money enough to bear my expences
back to London; and so I’m come to this pass, and the rogue that was
the occasion of it has left you without a sarvant, you may put me in his
place; and by Jasus, it is the best thing you can do.’--I begged to be
excused, declaring I could put up with any inconvenience, rather than
treat as a footman the descendant of Tir-Owen the Great. I advised
him to return to his friend, Mr Cosgrave, and take his passage from
Newcastle by sea, towards which I made him a small present, and he
retired, seemingly resigned to his evil fortune. I have taken upon trial
a Scotchman, called Archy M’Alpin, an old soldier, whose last master, a
colonel, lately died at Berwick. The fellow is old and withered; but he
has been recommended to me for his fidelity, by Mrs Humphreys, a very
good sort of a woman, who keeps the inn at Tweedmouth, and is much
respected by all the travellers on this road.
Clinker, without doubt, thinks himself happy in the removal of a
dangerous rival, and he is too good a Christian, to repine at Dutton’s
success. Even Mrs Jenkins will have reason to congratulate herself upon
this event, when she cooly reflects upon the matter; for, howsoever she
was forced from her poise for a season, by snares laid for her vanity,
Humphry is certainly the north-star to which the needle of her affection
would have pointed at the long run. At present, the same vanity is
exceedingly mortified, upon finding herself abandoned by her new
admirer, in favour of another inamorata. She received the news with a
violent burst of laughter, which soon brought on a fit of crying; and
this gave the finishing blow to the patience of her mistress, which had
held out beyond all expectation. She now opened all those floodgates of
reprehension, which had been shut so long. She not only reproached
her with her levity and indiscretion, but attacked her on the score
of religion, declaring roundly that she was in a state of apostacy
and reprobation; and finally, threatened to send her a packing at this
extremity of the kingdom. All the family interceded for poor Winifred,
not even excepting her slighted swain, Mr Clinker, who, on his knees,
implored and obtained her pardon.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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