The Expedition of Humphry ClinkerSmollett, T. (Tobias)
General
The Expedition of Humphry Clinker
Smollett, T. (Tobias)
Epistolary fiction; Great Britain -- Fiction; Travelers -- Fiction
therefore, at present, leave him to his repose, and call another of a
very different complexion.
You desire to have further acquaintance with the person of our aunt,
and promise yourself much entertainment from her connexion with Sir Ulic
Mackilligut: but in this hope you are baulked already; that connexion is
dissolved. The Irish baronet is an old hound, that, finding her carrion,
has quitted the scent--I have already told you, that Mrs Tabitha Bramble
is a maiden of forty-five. In her person, she is tall, raw-boned,
aukward, flat-chested, and stooping; her complexion is sallow and
freckled; her eyes are not grey, but greenish, like those of a cat, and
generally inflamed; her hair is of a sandy, or rather dusty hue; her
forehead low; her nose long, sharp, and, towards the extremity, always
red in cool weather; her lips skinny, her mouth extensive, her teeth
straggling and loose, of various colours and conformation; and her long
neck shrivelled into a thousand wrinkles--In her temper, she is proud,
stiff, vain, imperious, prying, malicious, greedy, and uncharitable. In
all likelihood, her natural austerity has been soured by disappointment
in love; for her long celibacy is by no means owing to her dislike of
matrimony: on the contrary, she has left no stone unturned to avoid the
reproachful epithet of old maid.
Before I was born, she had gone such lengths in the way of flirting
with a recruiting officer, that her reputation was a little singed. She
afterwards made advances to the curate of the parish, who dropped some
distant hints about the next presentation to the living, which was in
her brother’s gift; but finding that was already promised to another, he
flew off at a tangent; and Mrs Tabby, in revenge, found means to deprive
him of his cure. Her next lover was lieutenant of a man of war, a
relation of the family, who did not understand the refinements of the
passion, and expressed no aversion to grapple with cousin Tabby in the
way of marriage; but before matters could be properly adjusted, he went
out on a cruise, and was killed in an engagement with a French frigate.
Our aunt, though baffled so often, did not yet despair. She layed all
her snares for Dr Lewis, who is the fidus Achates of my uncle. She even
fell sick upon the occasion, and prevailed with Matt to interpose in her
behalf with his friend; but the Doctor, being a shy cock, would not be
caught with chaff, and flatly rejected the proposal: so that Mrs Tabitha
was content to exert her patience once more, after having endeavoured
in vain to effect a rupture betwixt the two friends; and now she thinks
proper to be very civil to Lewis, who is become necessary to her in the
way of his profession.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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