Yet, somehow, it was the inactive, calm Maria who loomed up in his
thoughts as the principal enchantress. Maria's apparent inactivity was
a blind; she did not do very much in the sense of rushing
helter-skelter after desirable things, but she obtained them
nevertheless. She got in their way so that they ran into her--then she
claimed them. She knew beforehand, as it were, the way they would take.
She was always there when anything worth happening was about. And
though she spoke so little--during a general conversation, for
instance--she said so much. At the end of all the talk, it was always
Maria who had said the important thing. Her "why" and "why not" that
very afternoon were all that he remembered of the intricate and long
discussion. It left the odd impression on his mind that talk, all the
world over, said one thing only; that the millions of talkers on the
teeming earth, eagerly chattering in many languages, said one and the
same thing only. There _was_ only one thing to be said.
That is--they were all trying to say it. Maria _had_ said it....
A whirring moth flew busily past the open window and vanished into the
night. He thought of his own books; for writers, painters, preachers,
musicians, these were trying to say it too. "If I could describe that
moth exactly," he murmured to himself, "give the sensation of its
flight, its unconscious attraction to the light, its plunge back into
the darkness, its precise purpose in the universe, its marvellous aim
and balance--its life, I could--er--"
The thought broke off with a jagged end. With a leap then it went on
again:
"Touch reality," and he heard his own voice saying it. He had uttered
it aloud. The sound had an odd effect upon him. He realised the
uselessness of words. No words touched reality. To be known, reality
had to be lived, experienced. Maria managed this in some extraordinary
way. She had reality.... Time did not humbug her. Nor did space....
Goodness!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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