The extraordinary confessions of Diana PleaseCapes, Bernard
General
The extraordinary confessions of Diana Please
Capes, Bernard
Femmes fatales -- Fiction; France -- Fiction; Historical fiction; Naples (Kingdom) -- Fiction; Women -- Fiction
Presently I was given a governess, my dear careless father’s nominee.
She was French, a _ci-devant maîtresse de pension_, very lazy and
self-indulgent, and, if not sleeping, she was always ogling for
unattached beaux. Vicious and insolent, she delighted in prompting me
to reflections on my mother’s self-reserve, and “honour” was as much
in her mouth as false teeth. I learned nothing from her but indecorum
and innuendo.
One day--for the moral to her teaching (it was when I was ten years
old)--I was playing truant on the downs, when I saw a small smutty
baby crawl from under a bush into the road at the very moment that a
carriage, wildly driven, was approaching. I had just time to notice
the gilded splendour of the equipage, and, perhaps,--let us be frank,
my friend,--to be inspired to heroism by the sight, before I leapt and
snatched up the child from under the very feet of the galloping
horses. As the chariot thundered by, an elegantly groomed head thrust
itself from the window, and a ruffled hand, waving to me standing
there unhurt but bewildered, flung back a gold coin into the dust. I
turned my back immediately, disillusioned, by the insolence of the
acknowledgment, as to the disinterested quality of my deed, and the
more so as the baby was, _parler franchement_, decidedly unpleasant. I
put the imp down, and began to re-order my little ruffled plumes.
Wouldst thou hear what they were, my Alcide? I can recall them at this
hour: A dainty gipsy hat knotted to a blue ribbon; a stomacher laced
over with silver twist, and a skirt to the ankles, both of flowered
lustring; three pair of ruffles at my bare elbows; a black solitaire
at my neck, and black shoes with red heels and the prettiest of paste
buckles.
Alas! how better than our sins of yesterday do we remember the
stockings we wore to sin in! Let me, for penance, concede to history
these my failings. I was, in fact, colourless in complexion, like
tinted porcelain, with what my detractors used to call spun-glass
hair, and the eyes of a Dresden shepherdess. And I was not at that
time light on my feet, with which my volatile spirits were always at
odds.
Now, as I smoothed my skirt, I was aware of a mad gipsy woman hurrying
from the bank towards me, and crying and gesticulating as she came.
She caught up the infant, and, finding it unharmed, put it down again,
and fawned upon me inarticulate. Then she broke off to curse the
distant carriage up hill and down, and finally went to pick up the
coin from the very spot where she had not failed to mark its fall.
“It is yours,” she said, striding back to me. “Take it!”
“You can keep it,” I answered, with my little nose in the air. “A lady
does not want for money.”
She slipped it into her pocket, and fell on her knees before me.
“Nor beauty, nor love, nor silken raiment,” she cried; “and yet they
are not all. Think, my darling! There be no need so wild but the poor
grateful gipsy may show a way to gratify it.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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