France -- Fiction; Identity -- Fiction; Love stories; Orphans -- Fiction; Young women -- Fiction
“No, you ought not to laugh at what is a great pleasure to your mother.
If some of her friends are a little eccentric, it is not for you to
remark upon it.”
He rose, began to walk excitedly up and down the room and then,
gradually mastering himself, came and sat opposite Gilberte again and
said:
“You are right, madame. Besides, among all those people whom I cannot
help criticizing, I have never heard you speak any but sensible,
judicious, intelligent words, admirable for their kindness and wisdom.
You always answer their most ridiculous questions as though they had
asked you about the most interesting things in life. One word from you
brings order and lucidity into the most absurd conversations.”
It was no longer the same voice. Usually so hard and dictatorial, it had
become humble and grave. And his face, which was generally severe, bore
an expression of infinite gentleness. One was no longer conscious of
acrimony, constraint or distrust, but of the frank unreserve of a
pent-up nature and of subdued melancholy.
Which of the two was the real Guillaume? Gilberte did not even ask
herself the question, was only too happy to believe at once in the more
attractive of the two images presented to her. And so she smiled upon
this second Guillaume and said:
“Then ... those gentlemen ...?”
“Your two protégés shall resume the places which they fill so well. I
insist, however, on a temporary exclusion as a punishment; for it is a
punishment to Le Hourteulx and Beaufrelant. After that, if they are very
good....”
“And you will be pleasant to them?”
“To them and to the others, at least as pleasant as I can.”
“Is it so very difficult?”
“Extremely! I can’t help it: I do not suffer fools gladly; they make me
irritable and unjust. I have not your charity.”
“It only needs a little indulgence; think of your mother.”
“Oh, my mother, my mother!”
There was something sorrowful and harsh about this exclamation that
struck Gilberte. She kept silence from a sense of delicacy. But
Guillaume was passing through one of those periods when it is a relief
to the over-burdened soul to confess its troubles:
“Have my mother and I ever understood each other? We have not an idea in
common. Her wants are not mine, nor are mine hers. She offends all my
tastes as I offend all hers. If I display so much bitterness against the
merry-andrews who perform in her _salon_, it is because of her. I hate
to see her countenancing their grimaces and posturings.”
She said nothing. He asked:
“You blame me for it, don’t you? Yes, yes, I feel it.... And how
strange: in your presence, I too think that I am wrong and, while I was
saying those things, I blushed as if I had uttered ugly thoughts!”
She laughed:
“They were not very pretty ones.”
“Never mind, I prefer you to know them. I do not wish to trick you into
liking me. If I ever win your esteem, I want to do so without hypocrisy,
without trying to hide my faults from you.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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